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Goliath (Free verse) by amanda_dcosta Goliath,
If only I could understand your fate.
You stand there undefeated
Gnashing your teeth and spitting out curses
Taking control of the world around you.
Goliath,
What makes you love
The fear that grows in each of us
As you pass by our doors
Watching, waiting devouring.
I see this Goliath in me,
Heâs trying to possess me
Trying to eat away at my life
Tugging me on and promising me comfort
Away from the daily chores of life.
I struggle.
He fights.
Itâs a never ending battle.
This Goliath of laziness in meâ¦
When will this battle ever end?
Yes, when will this battle ever end!
Up the ladder:
Paris 1941-63
Down the ladder:
Forest Rain
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.875
Posted: July 1, 2006 7:14 PM PDT; Last modified: July 1, 2006 7:24 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.7732067 Overall Rank: 1748 Comments:
[9]
Ranger @ 81.158.154.112
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1-Jul-06/9:15 PM
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Reply
Good questions, excellent take on Goliath. It's pretty ironic that the laziness fights so much...I think of it more like a dead weight against which we struggle. The only thing I'd really change here is removing the exclamation mark at the end...they rarely appeal to me in poetry. Others may, of course, disagree.
This poem remind me of a painting by Goya:
http://www.pkimaging.com/pic/mikp/art/go and a lithograph by Goya: http://www.artchive.com/artchive/g/goya/ Good take on the Goliath theme.
Thanks guys. Hope you enjoyed the new outlook to each of our Goliaths.
Yeah good analogy. Goliath is big, bad and scary. Lets use him as a metaphor for all the big, bad, scary things in life.
Thanks DA. and sorry I couldn't chat with you.
I like the beginning a lot--"gnashing your teeth and spitting out curses." Good stuff. I like the metaphor aspects the best--you lose me a bit when you make it so explicit what "goliath" is (you don't give us a chance to figure it out ourselves).
Thanks ecargo. But I'm very bad at presenting riddles.... somehow they never turn out right.
The beginning promises some fierce, ugly obstacle to which a well-aimed stone is fatal. But to compare the blithe thing, laziness, to Goliath--well, I think a giant slug would fit better. Still, the very unexpected turn has appeal. And being unbelievable is a trait of non-fiction.
Giants always appear to be lazy, think about it. The Jolly Green Giant and Paul Bunyan are my only exceptions.
Thanks Dovina.
Actually laziness in all reality isn't a giant slug, and for that matter all our various Goliaths , say, greed, money, gambling, drink, etc. When you actually want to get around it, you feel the actual battle rage within you. When you give in, you become the slug.
Amanda, great poem, I'll think of this every time I start to procrastinate--as I often do.
Hi Paul... thanks. Looks like its food for thought for all of us.
How are you? Haven't seen you around lately. . 296 view(s)
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