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Nectar of Infinity (Ode) by MacFrantic Oh simple waters
Green-blue prognosticator
What for are you so salty?
Daring to escape the coercion of time
The rotting wood
The worn and weathered stone
How you survive them all
Oh formless depths
Caressing the cellar of life
Why such depraved pretension?
Swimmingly fraught with contempt
The whole of man
The chasmal preterition of death
How you survive them all
Up the ladder:
My Guardian Angel
Down the ladder:
What I really needed
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.875
Posted: January 12, 2005 11:47 AM PST; Last modified: January 12, 2005 11:47 AM PSTWeighted score: 5.7732067 Overall Rank: 1748 Comments:
[9]
Shuushin @ 147.154.235.51
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12-Jan-05/2:00 PM
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Reply
nice
Very nice
this is great... 10
It flows nicely and contains some awsome images, but altogether, it lacks motive and is too broad. It fails to pinpoint any real life issue.
The last verse seems a bit tacked on. The rest is very nice to read but you do know that people don't write like that anymore.
I do.
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