There once was a chap called Simon, Who pranced around like Bill Wyman, But Bill he was not, The closest he got, Was splitting Mandy Smith's Hyman.

Before I got to the end of the first line, I knew the second was going to end in "I let out a yelp." Isn't that weird?

Bingo.

This sounds very much like... DAVE AIDS. http://www.poemranker.com/poem-details.jsp?id=14609

refreshing i like your style

i don't like it it's pretty cliche

like the descriptions sometimes a bit over the top though

beautiful

i like the mystique you have alot of potential

Title's all wrong. Should be called 'Ode To My Dildo On Loan'

I looked at my backside in the mirror: it was covered in prawns. When that happens you know it's time to put down the pogo stick and get the fuck out of Shrimpsville. I'm Dick Bumston, P.I.

"the smell of your snatch lets me know that your bleeding there's a russet coloured jam rag in your pants and your needing the full action blood nappy before the jam rag begins to fall you say it best when you say nothing at all"

Are you dyslexic?

Beautiful! I wrote a similar letter to Jesus in heaven once but when I dropped it in the mail, it came back marked "address unknown." I'll bet Bukowski's address in hell would come back similarly stamped. You know, except for that rough part at the end, Jesus life (according to those stories about him) was unusual in its simplicity. A bible scholar with no children, no wife, no job (he probably knew a trade--cabinetmaker or something?) and, most of all, he was an idealist. Give all your money to the poor and follow me. Don't all political parties say something similar? Give your money to me and become poor. I don't think that these two guys had a clue about "daily living" in the 20th-21rst century. "Blessed are the understanding for they shall die in grotesque ways. I was a bum once in San Francisco who happened to go to the Symphony...But something about the music was not right. I preferred to listen to it on my radio." Talk about lowered expectations. I could live like Jesus or Bukowski if I expected nothing but inspiration in return. The rest of us gotta work to pay rent and ... Well, your poem has obviously punched my buttons. Both of these guys, however, not having a clue as to how to be a good parent would probably look you with admiration in their eyes and say, "You done good. See ya soon!" You're reply, I see, is "How would you know?" I wish there were an extra credit button in poemranker. I'd push it every time someone intrudes upon my daily fugue and wakes me up. [10+]

I was disappointed to see that you had deleted all your poems. I enoyed reading them hun.

Oh I'm sure you could train hamsters. Maybe you should write a poem about scottish midgets, or Irish midgets, could be interesting.

What a fucking joke, I wish JUST FOR ONCE, the stupid pointless shit that makes up your pathetic existence worked on me.

Unreadable BBQ'd tripe

Good well thought out poem

yep I like this 2 lots of feeling? 9