Dovina
on some deleted poem
20 Jan 2005, 11:04 AM
If you mean a blind person, then the beginning is good. But the conclusion eludes me, since we must see or feel or hear the beautiful thing before we can know its beauty.
I think it's pretty good, but I'd use out of instead of outta.
well done
in an age of...much better than your last, D.
beautifully written, although sad.
lamplight's glow ;)
definitely a lot of interesting imagery here, though you've lost me with what's going on. someone suggests murder, and I suppose I could see that--but not enough. "black dog" makes me think (of a friend, firstly, but after that) maybe--a hit and run... or a car crash (oil slick, and chasing shadows). Well, the words give me a car crash, the dog makes me think hit and run. Can you tell I'm really, really lost?
I'd like a few more crumbs of detail to piece the puzzle together.
More showing and less telling. You could say all this much more beautifully with fewer words and a little more specific.
Nonsense, the dawn of reason has never been less likely in the U.S.: your President is a religious fanatic and your country is inhabited by moronic zealots. CNBC and Fox news fill your minds up with tripe and as a consequence there is no country in the world as close minded and addicted to a misconceived notion of freedom. No doubt Thomas Jefferson would be happy to see how the dawn of reason had broken across an obese landscape to reveal a country full of be-mulletted half wits travelling from one dispensary of sugary confection to another whilst becrying the joy of living in a land where freedom of thought extends to which Krispy Kreme donught they will fill their fat mouths with next.
Of course it sounds like it's about doggie roadkill but even if it isn't...-10- Good.
um.........not the best work for sure...
-mega
um.....okay then.......kind of .........odd.......i think (6)
-mega
Can't even be bothered to read it.
May I be the second to congratulate you on the depth of your failure and the nonsensical desperation of your attempts to rhyme.
Ten fingers make you retch
When I ram them down your throat.
Ten fingers really stretch
The anus of a stoat.
Ten fingers claw and scratch
Your baby's screaming face.
Ten fingers fist your snatch
With style and class and grace.
Utterly, utterly sordid and shameful.
Awfully good/bad.
Don't be gay
Join the Army
Mr. Garcia Black, I've said it before and I'll say it again, I supremely enjoy your stuff. My self-confidence is on an all time high. Thank you,sir.
very nice...............
-mega