on Don't Say You Understand by cuddlytiger17
21 May 2004, 5:55 PM
This is MUCH better. Is this a new one that you wrote?
replying on Tony Blair's sagging purple johnny by Stephen Robins
21 May 2004, 4:54 PM
Well, you are partly right. I am poor, young and I do HAVE a scrotum which houses a pair of very large balls.
So, let me make this clear to you:
YOU are a bargain basement -=Dark_Angel=-,P.I. You think you are being clever with your comments but you lack the wit and intellect to make them anything but annoying.
It makes no difference, though, because your inability to understand the question better proves my point than anything that I could say.
So, let me make this clear to you:
YOU are a bargain basement -=Dark_Angel=-,P.I. You think you are being clever with your comments but you lack the wit and intellect to make them anything but annoying.
It makes no difference, though, because your inability to understand the question better proves my point than anything that I could say.
on Tony Blair's sagging purple johnny by Stephen Robins
21 May 2004, 1:42 PM
Does it ever get old being a bargain-basement
-=Dark_Angel=-?
-=Dark_Angel=-?
on Let Me Swing by caitydee
21 May 2004, 1:23 PM
not too bad.
on done than said by francis nor capule
20 May 2004, 1:18 PM
just a word of advice...stop naming your poems "untitled". Surely you can come up with a name for them. That title just makes the whole thing boring even if it isn't.
replying on Unwed by gilded in gold
19 May 2004, 8:54 PM
then you could rhyme it with Philadelphonic.
replying on Unwed by gilded in gold
19 May 2004, 8:41 PM
ungarnished? I don't know. I think unpainted is fine.
on Unwed by gilded in gold
19 May 2004, 8:33 PM
unpainted moments, eh.....ok...I'll bite -9-
on Just Like Before by cuddlytiger17
19 May 2004, 3:25 PM
You're getting better. Just try not to force the rhymes so much.
replying on Sarah's Song by wilco
19 May 2004, 1:51 PM
Ok, I see what your saying. I guess I'm one of those "Hey Guys" guys.
But, you know, if writers used reality it would be more like:
Sarah cooked dinner and got pissed
because I said it was 'pretty' good.
She wouldn't give me a blowjob
for a week and that really sucked.
But, you know, if writers used reality it would be more like:
Sarah cooked dinner and got pissed
because I said it was 'pretty' good.
She wouldn't give me a blowjob
for a week and that really sucked.
replying on Sarah's Song by wilco
19 May 2004, 1:42 PM
Ok, then. thanks. Even if you were comparing it to "Meet Virginia", though, I guess there are worse you could'vr compared it to....like Creed....
and
She does not exist. I made her up. fic-sho-nul.
and
She does not exist. I made her up. fic-sho-nul.
replying on Sarah's Song by wilco
19 May 2004, 1:36 PM
So are you saying that this sounds like 'Meet Virginia' or are you just talking about that particular song because they are both about women?
replying on Sarah's Song by wilco
18 May 2004, 6:58 PM
thanks.
replying on Sarah's Song by wilco
18 May 2004, 6:55 PM
It flows better with music. I know it's hard to get the right flow with a lyric, though when you don't have the music with it.
on I MISS YOU by jroday
18 May 2004, 12:24 PM
First, I think that you definitely need to get some more experience before you write something like this. It's a good sentiment but you're ruining it with your lack of style and understanding of how to write. Take the advice of SupremeDreamer.