Re: Love by NinjaPoet |
29-Jan-03/10:52 PM |
The title of the film should be in quotations not apostrophes. That is unless you put quotations around what the character on the answering machine is saying, which would be proper and justify what your are doing at that point. Is "Weneverlaughedsohard" (note proper use) a word. I looked it up and it was not in the dictionary.
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Re: a comment on Love by NinjaPoet |
29-Jan-03/10:48 PM |
To further clarify: Sturgis is actually a quaint town on the northern fringe of the Black Hills in South Dakota. Do you need to know where South Dakota is?
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Re: The Thought Of It by Christof |
28-Jan-03/11:39 PM |
Still the best poem on the site. I would kill the all cap thing, but damn, who cares, this is just good. Had to come read it again.
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Re: Dr. Skellington by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. |
28-Jan-03/11:33 PM |
You are the one true king of the Masonic order of odd balls.
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Re: missing time by Bill Z Bub |
28-Jan-03/11:30 PM |
The flip flopping of voice and context is awkward. There a a few nice lines, but there is still work to be done here.
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Re: amanda by famenglory |
28-Jan-03/10:50 PM |
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Re: Guilt by Freethinker1602 |
28-Jan-03/10:17 PM |
You reached really deep into the crap bin for this one, huh?
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Re: A Puzzling Girl by Imperfections |
28-Jan-03/10:11 PM |
A nice concept but I think the overall effort need more thought.
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Re: Breaking Away by wickedemon4 |
28-Jan-03/10:04 PM |
Best biking movie ever made, although if you notice when he it topping 50 plus MPH behind the semi he is in his small chain ring. But, hey, it is a movie. It is sad you titled such a bad poem for such a great sports movie. Shame on you.
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Re: A Day, Wasted by Joyleaf |
28-Jan-03/3:36 PM |
Great use of the "statement". Fantastic use of telling rather than showing. Great use of "Party" three times in less than 40 lines, dude.
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Re: Cover song by bondjedi |
28-Jan-03/3:26 PM |
How exacty is this a haiku?
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Re: Unpleasant Morning by liljsmith87 |
28-Jan-03/3:25 PM |
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Re: Hermes Trigamestus (was not a monk edit) by Jeremi B. Handrinos |
28-Jan-03/2:35 PM |
Well, at least you still have the day job. Or is it done at night?
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Re: a comment on me, Deep-as-a-puddle and the elusive connection by lunar |
28-Jan-03/2:04 PM |
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Re: a comment on Longing by galiana |
28-Jan-03/10:35 AM |
I have been meaning to ask you since your lovely debate with the Iowa fellow: Which Hawking kid are you?
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Re: Longing by galiana |
28-Jan-03/10:33 AM |
Great knowledge of adjectives!!
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Re: a comment on The last day of an old year by poetandknowit |
23-Jan-03/3:56 PM |
So are you giving me a 26? Wow, you are sooooooooooo sweet DA!!!! xoxoxoxoxo
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Re: a comment on The last day of an old year by poetandknowit |
23-Jan-03/3:55 PM |
The girls actually gave me that word. They said it. The money was for church programs that promoted....well. I wanted to put it in the first draft but did not know how. I told Z, she said it should go in and I struggled for a week to get it in there. I had it all over the place. I don't think it is sexual in the poem; it simply gives a bit more depth to what the girls are doing. In the physical world selling the wind chimes has to be for something. That would be there innocence, I guess. I think it relates to the narrarator and what he has ultimately turned away. His transition. It is weird, but the further a death moves into the past the more convoluted the images become when personalized. I can still put images of the physical event into a clear picture, but my grief is wrapped up in all sorts of mixed metaphors. Thanks for the read. I did not change the first line. But I changes the second!!
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Re: Martyr by kawakurdi |
22-Jan-03/1:19 PM |
Decent read until "Satan pooh-poohed". I wasn't sure what the intended purpose was there: so I just laughed. Sorry.
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Re: Broken Tomarrow by DreamMachine |
22-Jan-03/1:15 PM |
Interesting spelling and use of grammar.
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