Re: Reflection by Judas kiss	15-Nov-03/12:29 AM
i no comprenday "lips which life my down" I like how you say "you define in a single kiss The inexpressible" De-lark the last three lines, and remove the word love once and the whole thing will be better for it. -7- prolly a good deal higher without the first crit.
Re: Inane Muttering by Don-Quixote	15-Nov-03/12:35 AM
"occurrence" as it is used is a missed opportunity, methinks. Why were they welcome? (sarcasm aside) Other than that, pretty frickin' solid. -9-
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Nov-03/12:38 AM
semicolon here? Why? twine on its own line maybe instead? besides that, its a pretty vivid image - wondering what to do with it now that its in my head (you have my attention; wanting more). -7- for making me hungry.
Re: Memoirs of a Monk II - Sacred Witness by Don-Quixote	15-Nov-03/12:39 AM
was this yoderian constructed last stanza in the last version? quickly now - make it engrish!
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Nov-03/12:47 AM
This moves. This clicks, cricks and whirrs - but I don't know what kind of machine it is. an -8- for a fresh theme, especially.
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Nov-03/12:52 AM
"yine" :O) fun language, but I have no idea what this is saying. White plains? Is that new york or NEW JERSEY??!? I'm giving this a -7- for making me grab a map. and why you kill all yer old stuff?
Re: Memoirs of a Monk II - Sacred Witness by Don-Quixote	15-Nov-03/12:59 AM
oh - can you dump my creds line; gives me the heebies. glad to help though.
Re: Gen. Rockman & his dirt encrusted clicker brigade by Y2kSlamPoet	15-Nov-03/7:21 AM
Would probably be good as a performance piece. I imagine an enraged 14 year old, resplendent in his street creds and hard won disrespect for the "man" and how society is oppressing him and his "posse" of "homies", a few gold chains and base-ball cap doing that arm crossing thing that was popular in the early 90's. Yo yo you – Maybe spice it up with some “izza”’s at the end of a few sentences. yeah, that would be dope. Do it. -5- (same shit, different day)
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Nov-03/10:47 AM
its got that formula for a good lyric - familiar lines and rhymes - gonna hit the median heart and mind. but you have a few deeper points here and there; works well enough. -8- cuz I was a hard-ass, east-german judge on your last one.
Re: Sagittarius by INTRANSIT	15-Nov-03/10:48 AM
Roger that; nicely done. -9-
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Nov-03/1:11 PM
is true, is true. six words - you're getting there. -8-
Re: A Coven of Toes by sixtoedwonder	15-Nov-03/1:14 PM
Love the title. Love the ditty - make a me laugh, yes, it did. have an -8-
Re: Breakfast by flouredweevle	15-Nov-03/1:16 PM
welcome to the USSR, comrade. This would make a good Senryu. -7- for what could have been.
Re: The Poemranker Poe-lease by Jeremi B. Handrinos	15-Nov-03/3:21 PM
oh christ, not more. Can't you write about anything else other than how you've been wronged by the nefarious poemranker characters? -0-
Re: Don't Look At Me! by assisenormus	15-Nov-03/4:15 PM
a poem per user name, one way to do it. this is cute. -7-
Re: Thong Thoo by fatmansinging	15-Nov-03/4:18 PM
why you make me read this? huh? is is kinda catchy though... so, I think that, and the fact it is made up entirely of words that, I figure, are of your own construction - brings it up to a: -1-
Re: Preacher Man by masticatedmess	15-Nov-03/4:19 PM
too easy, this one. And you should not masticate, it is against God's law, and you will be blinded. blessed with a 1.
Re: This is Bad by newagepoet2000	16-Nov-03/6:54 AM
LoL - actually, this is wicked funny. A potential classic. -9-
Re: hello eternity by justjay	16-Nov-03/6:57 AM
Not too bad, I think the "then" in stanza three wants to be a "than" -7-
Re: Oh No! by foothangingoutofass	16-Nov-03/7:00 AM
a pretty good, if done, image. This kindof thing comes pretty easy to most people, even non-poets -5-