Re: Where are my Spectacles? by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?	8-Sep-03/8:13 AM
sounds like you need to get some new glasses ;)
Re: Dunce in a Sack by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?	8-Sep-03/8:09 AM
*laughing* I love it. 10
Re: A Lovely Surprise by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?	8-Sep-03/8:06 AM
I'm not much of one to judge sonnets.. but it was interesting... I liked it. Paints the story quite clearly.
Re: a comment on (Untitled) by LuckyJoe	8-Sep-03/8:03 AM
Thanks for the comment. I've been working to get better. I'm a spotty writing. Some of its good... and well some of its real shit. Think its like that for most everyone.
Re: :) by Moniquesuvee	8-Sep-03/8:00 AM
I'm thinking you needed to get away from the “ave” its meant for cruising. This poem... well its a bruising on the eyes. I can rhyme. Look I’m a poet and didn’t know it maybe I should publish a book. Yes my comment is as bad as the poem. *does a little dance*
Re: a comment on Alien Abduction by LuckyJoe	5-Sep-03/8:06 AM
How would you suggest? To me I could change change the title and end it after "Run, moving quick as stone." line. Or you could leave the title the same and just leave a lot unsaid for the reader to decide. Can't wait to see what you were thinking.
Re: a comment on Why Stay? by LuckyJoe	5-Sep-03/8:03 AM
Indeed it was. Not sure what I was thinking. I'm reading it all over now... and see many reasons not to end it like that. Why is there still a door jam to go under if the walls have fallen down. If someone is caged, chained, in a prison of some sort why is there a door jam near them. Thanks for pointing that out..made me look at it and see what was wrong.
Re: a comment on Why Stay? by LuckyJoe	1-Sep-03/12:53 PM
I just can't type :)
Re: a comment on Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe	26-Aug-03/9:39 AM
Still missing the point. Somehow by my writing he thinks that I myself am a vulgarity, or a disparaging member of society. Still not making any sense, how can he judge ME based upon my writing. If he wants to judge my writing he may do so all he wants, but don’t judge me because of my writing. If the writing has no events containing that of my own life then judging me based upon how you view my writing seems selfish, childish, and ignorant.
Re: a comment on Addiction leaving by death by LuckyJoe	25-Aug-03/6:03 PM
*smiles* Thanks for the help hun. I'll work on it some when I get home from work. Guess my main part with writing is I want to give a message, so I write one given way to make the person see what it is that I want to say. If I'm going to be writing to entertain others I'm going to have to start writing for them...not for myself. Again I thank you for all the information and help in this battle. Always... lucky
Re: a comment on Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe	25-Aug-03/4:28 PM
And how was any of this niggerish? You're comments never make any sense...
Re: a comment on Addiction leaving by death by LuckyJoe	25-Aug-03/4:18 PM
I'll agree that it needs work. But I don't agree that it sounds like something bob dole would write. I'm a recovering druggy I've been there I've done and felt the stuff in this poem. Do you know what it feels like wanting to quit and not being able to...keep saying you're going to and everyday again you're doing something to get by. Get excited for weeks and sit around in a trance without a thought in your head. What made me decide it was time to give everything up was when I had a breakdown... I wake shaking out of control, my heart racing a million beats a minute. Everyone has an idea of what drugs do... but they don't have a real clue until they've had to start start at zero and below and rebuild their life because of how deep into them they were. It took near death for me to finally see the light.
Re: a comment on Candle Lit Night by LuckyJoe	23-Aug-03/9:00 PM
And that tells me exactally what?
Re: a comment on Upon a falling star (new/changed) by LuckyJoe	21-Aug-03/8:56 AM
Hehe I'll take a look through some of my new shit and see what I've got. This was a new one... and its not so much a poem... its kinda ment to be a song. And yes its missing a beginning. Its uncooked due to being a song rather than poem. *goes to look at some of his new stuff that he can post on Sunday sometime*
Re: a comment on A Rose by LuckyJoe	18-Aug-03/10:08 AM
I might be striking out... but this and some of the others were wrote a long time ago. I wrote this hmmm 6 years ago when I was 14-15. I'll post something new before to long. But as I said...most my work lately has felt and looked very forced...not worth posting.
Re: a comment on Icecream Soul by LuckyJoe	16-Aug-03/12:50 PM
Where is here? Where is there? *walks around nodding head in confushion*
Re: a comment on Icecream Soul by LuckyJoe	16-Aug-03/12:49 PM
Like my masterbation? I surely hope you haven't seen what mine looks like...ewww *shuts all the blinds* What would you suggest here? You're comment didn't tell me anything other than reading the poem put food on your mind... food and sex. Strawberries anyone? hehe
Re: a comment on Icecream Soul by LuckyJoe	16-Aug-03/12:47 PM
How would you suggest I use more chutzpah inturn being more brazen giving it more presumptuousness? As soon as I do that I'm going to be spoon feeding the reader the metaphor am I not? Suggestions would be great here... thanks :)
Re: Day Of Reckoning by Kitch	13-Aug-03/3:41 PM
mulberry is right with what they said. It does need a little work. I can't judge much though due to all my working sucking as of late. I can understand everything you're saying to well. I just got out of a relationship a few months ago that was just like what you wrote about. Felt the same way. -9- (Only because it brought back the memories I had once felt)
Re: a comment on Concieted Checkmate. by LuckyJoe	12-Aug-03/10:51 AM
You really want to see my brain smoke don't you? My poetry as of late has been crap... very forced. Haven't had a clear mind on life so should stop writing till I get everything figured out. Hmmm I'll try to think of something better for my next poem... hopefully I won't have to force to write it. Thanks for the support/push Dreamer.