| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/11:39 PM |
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you always repell me p&k, but isn't that your self-proclaimed M.O.? 'just the blood' is the dual thing again, (the mess, the familial ties), and also because, dammit, it need the word 'just' to justify the structure--1st and last lines ea stanza are their own entities as well, and without 'just' it don't werk that way. yes, the hole is exaggerated in size. you got me. the act is big, so the hole has mirrored it. and in the kitchen, bastion of domesticity...
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/11:22 PM |
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i think that brings it around nicely.
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/11:08 PM |
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i am thinking about making the '5 out of 6' stanza the 1st. any opinions as to how that would read?
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/11:06 PM |
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gracias, amiga. yes, her very own r&r. no helmet, and she often 'forgets' her night glasses, and rides in shades after dark... i'm sure there's a few more chambers, but i've only known her a year now. she is amazing, steel and mayfly...
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/10:39 PM |
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4 is tighter now, p&k. maybe i'll squeeze it some more tomorrow.
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| Re: Waking Up by PawnedTidal |
9-Sep-02/10:14 PM |
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this one's growing on me...
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/10:07 PM |
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yes, laugh and crack are intentional repetitions. the second is an empathetic keening; does is make more sense as such, or still weak? you mean the comma by 'undone'? i think it has 2 meanings with the comma in and only one without it...yes. the 4th will be tightened, but this is less than 2 hours old now, so... thanks
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/9:43 PM |
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sorry Frass, i didn't mean to delete your comment. giddy fingers this late at night, you know. maybe i should be more scard than i am...but, my motto is, always make friends with the bouncers. they have saved my ass a couple of times. i seem to like to ask strangers probing questions, after a coupla pints...especially if the band's good
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| Re: I Love You!! by Babieflirt |
9-Sep-02/9:40 PM |
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OH...MY...GAWD!!! i coulnd't have said it better myself. um, i mean, i couldn't have said it. at least not like this. prithee, Jesu, show mercy, for i have not: 1
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| Re: The Writing Life by poetandknowit |
9-Sep-02/9:37 PM |
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and measures you by the fact that your lawn's not edged...right? this made me laugh. these are the neighbors i grow my dandelions for, p&k.
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| Re: Oaxaca city fragment by poetandknowit |
9-Sep-02/9:35 PM |
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a sharp-edged shard, this is. you paint it clean in my mind.
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| Re: My cousin's baby sitter. by Bachus |
9-Sep-02/9:34 PM |
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| Re: a comment on Russian Roulette by <~> |
9-Sep-02/9:25 PM |
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sometimes, you want to know why they have that qulity, but are afraid to ask. i finally asked her.
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| Re: a comment on The punch drunk underwriter by horus8 |
9-Sep-02/7:14 PM |
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well. my. oh. the things one misses when the site is unstable. most of the time, i quite enjoy the crypic nature of the weavings. this one was well beyond me. the history give me access to it, and i humbly thank you for the lengthy explanation. and i do love access.
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| Re: Chronicled dreams of a silent lover by dilips_10 |
7-Sep-02/3:25 PM |
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this is a beautiful thought.
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| Re: I've got the eaten my crustacean soulmate blues by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. |
7-Sep-02/3:04 PM |
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i love this poeme. i think i'll marry it. oh, wait. the cat's gotten it. damn.
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| Re: Mean Matt was so mean, when a homeless guy asked him for change he gave him a -blank- by beakism |
7-Sep-02/3:01 PM |
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perhaps it is ben/alex/god...maybe his real name is matt, and maybe he's a dick?
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| Re: More 7-Eleven holdups. by Bachus |
7-Sep-02/1:54 PM |
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it was very wrong. you know they wanted it. plus, they WERE asking for it, weren't they?
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| Re: The punch drunk underwriter by horus8 |
7-Sep-02/1:53 PM |
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what is up with the juvenile rhyming in the first part of 16 lost? guide me, oh ergoted one, for i fail to see the light. oh, and, where do thoughts come from?
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| Re: Trust Exercise by proteusplum |
6-Sep-02/1:38 PM |
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too many cloud-like clouds in 2, other than that, not a cloud in sight.
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