regarding some deleted poem... |
17-Jan-03/11:36 AM |
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Re: OK, I apologize - it's steaming shite and no mistake, but it was the best I could come up with on the spur of the moment. I'm off to slit my wrists now, since writer's block has sent me spiralling into the depths of the deepest depression in human history... by Yardbird |
17-Jan-03/11:38 AM |
I hope you don't hurt yourself. It isn't the right thing to do. I like this limerick lots and lots and I hope you stick around and write more.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
17-Jan-03/11:40 AM |
veyr nice. been here for a while, still good!
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Re: Untitled by ==Doylum |
17-Jan-03/11:45 AM |
nork - the capital nof new jersey, right?
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Re: Dear Mr. Poetry, could you hold my purse? <how does babbit do it> by horus8 |
21-Jan-03/7:36 AM |
except for the shouting, i like this. I think the "!"s could go.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
24-Jan-03/7:46 AM |
Odd. I can't think of anything else to say. just Odd. for that, you get a 9.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
24-Feb-03/8:37 AM |
a powerful blend of images. bravo.
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Re: "Crying" by Jaketiger |
24-Feb-03/12:22 PM |
blah blah blah I'm sad. try to use a metaphor or two--some fresh language. you almost did it with the needle in the heart, but instead you missed the target, punctured a lung and are making this gurgling sound. try some concise images.
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Re: "loveless life" by Jaketiger |
24-Feb-03/12:25 PM |
plagued by typos (such as "traped" and "tstay"), it makes it tough to read and detracts from any poetic quality. cut the redundancies and tighten up your language. try some images--similes, metaphors--fresh ones not "daggar of fate" trite stuff. push yourself. don't be afraid.
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Re: A Lost Friend by Ray |
24-Feb-03/12:28 PM |
YAWN. bo-ring. theraputing wring is a nice thing to do, but too often folks think it is good for sharing. keep these to yourself. write about something new.
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Re: A Lost Friend by Ray |
24-Feb-03/2:38 PM |
Don't be discouraged. Keep trying. We are all trying.
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Re: (untitled) by Ray |
24-Feb-03/2:41 PM |
Hope it wasn't something I said. :)
Nice use of form, a bit heavy on the assonance--beware of sounding too sing-songy. 6.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
26-Feb-03/5:20 AM |
I like it. I once knew a woman who wrote an entire essay about Fred Astaire's hands--how lovely they must've been and how nobody ever looked at them. this reminded me of that. I like the first few images in particular. 9
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Re: Greek Tragedy#1 by Mr Pig |
26-Feb-03/5:24 AM |
I like it.
as for present conversation here, I will say nothing ten times.
there.
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Re: Crucifixion by Mr Pig |
7-Mar-03/7:33 AM |
4
7
6
nice thought, though.
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Re: Revelation ( 666 ) by Mr Pig |
7-Mar-03/7:36 AM |
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regarding some deleted poem... |
7-Mar-03/7:37 AM |
the fork is a cliche'. try soemthing else (but not a spoon) the rest is all right.
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Re: The Kansas City Chiefs suck by Jeremi B. Handrinos |
7-Mar-03/7:38 AM |
First haiku- 8.5
second - 4.5
average- 6.
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Re: Blustered by INTRANSIT |
7-Mar-03/7:39 AM |
something besides "it" please. The pronoun makes the whole poem inprecise and less poetic.
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Re: The Dark one's 2000th comment by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
7-Mar-03/7:40 AM |
I'm confused. thank you. confusion can be good sometimes.
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