Re: Him. by Sway	28-Jan-06/4:32 AM
Having read "You." before this one I thought they'd be parts of the same story...am I missing something obvious? Very angsty but a lot better done than most.
Re: Oblivion by Sway	28-Jan-06/4:35 AM
Not bad, unoriginal though. You've evidently got the imagination to better this. Hint of the day: rhyming 'love' with 'above' (or 'dove') wil turn a lot of people off straight away.
Re: The copper man and Labrador by Caducus	28-Jan-06/4:45 AM
Awesome stuff, I don't care if no vagrant owns a Labrador, to him I expect it was one. Wonderful poem.
Re: Tree of Life by ALChemy	28-Jan-06/4:48 AM
It makes me wish I'd seen such a scene in my life.
Re: In praise of racism by INTRANSIT	28-Jan-06/4:54 AM
Demon opener! Didn't get the last clause, but I'm a bit slow at the moment. The rest is a grand take on human failings.
Re: The Heart of a Man by Queen of Tease	28-Jan-06/5:04 AM
Errm, is this meant to be serious? Not a bad poem, but I can't tell if you're having a laugh or not...
Re: After Fighting (More Blood Edit) by zodiac	28-Jan-06/5:10 AM
There's an anger that this doesn't quite release in its current form. I'd have liked to have seen it as prose, but I shall have to content myself with being sonneted about the face and neck. Vicious, nearly violent.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Jan-06/5:14 AM
Nice, very nice.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Jan-06/5:23 AM
Last two lines, brilliant...it feels as thought there's something to add to this poem - I just haven't got a clue as to what it might be.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Jan-06/5:29 AM
Okay, so this is now one of my favourite poems on this site...despite your distaste for the spiritual and the artistic (quite ironic, given in poetic form as it is). I'd write more here, but you'd get bored after...here.
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	28-Jan-06/5:44 AM
I've got nothing to say that others haven't already said...this goes onto my favourites list...
Re: A Sheep’s Wish by Dovina	28-Jan-06/12:15 PM
Yes, clever and entertaining, I like this one.
Re: Round 27 by Dovina	28-Jan-06/12:19 PM
Not sure yet what to make of this one, I will have to ponder it further and return.
Re: Racial Hate by Glasseyez	29-Jan-06/3:43 AM
a) Blood is blue when starved of oxygen, and white blood cells are white (okay, you want to kill me now) b) I think it would work more effectively in prose form
Re: Sky All Around Me (goddess edit) by ecargo	29-Jan-06/3:51 AM
I found it odd that the sparrows should chant above the priestess, is that done deliberately? A good poem, although it felt like there was another verse waiting to be written.
Re: For such is a child’s heart by amanda_dcosta	29-Jan-06/3:58 AM
Personally I'd change the first line, give it a little more lyricism; this is a nice enough piece, but read out loud it is somewhat too bulky (for me, anyway). There's definitely potential here, I just feel it needs a couple of edits while being read aloud.
Re: Sunday Legs by D. $ Fontera	29-Jan-06/4:02 AM
Very sexy, made me think of movie stars.
Re: After Rain by Niphredil	29-Jan-06/4:09 AM
Yes, I'd agree with zodiac here. You work the rhyme very well and the rhythm is fairly constant - although 'finally' in line 3 is tricky; I'm torn between giving this a 7 and an 8, 8 for now I think as I'm in a good mood, but this is well worth an edit and I'll be sure to check it again.
regarding some deleted poem...	29-Jan-06/4:12 AM
Yes, get rid of the commas - they detract from the reading of this.
Re: My testament to free speech by Glasseyez	29-Jan-06/4:15 AM
'Of shit and lies'...turns me off straight away...there's some good content here (without delving into a discussion of universal outlooks) but I'd like to see it edited first. 6 for now, although after a reworking it'll be worth more.