on Revised Dream (Final Version) by Wakeboarder20
24 Mar 2006, 2:07 PM
What pulls me into this poem is the repetition ~ it does sound prayer-like. I agree with Ranger that a positive based poem is refreshing.
on Butterfly Belly, Orchid Face by Sunny
24 Mar 2006, 12:43 PM
I agree that the ( ) break the flow of this, but otherwise, it's a gem! Many visuals and consistent flood of colors.
on How small, this sleeping tiger by ecargo
24 Mar 2006, 8:02 AM
In this poem, I see "Monkey" - the name I gave to a kitten, found after a storm. My garden was her home and oh, she was stealth in her attack of any leaf floating by... and she could climb like a monkey, fast and furious.. and sleep with the birds in a nest (no kidding). She's an indoor cat now, but all the same hunt games in play. This is a precious poem, filled with the joy in watching the natural beauty of animals.
replying on Indiscrete by ecargo
24 Mar 2006, 7:55 AM
Lol.. thanks for the positive potential, but I have to say most of my girlfriends would agree with your poem rather than the "giddy, sated and oddly triumphant" view. ;-)
on Muff by Stephen Robins
24 Mar 2006, 7:44 AM
Oh my God, this is awful... *still laughing*
replying on Empty Chronicles by Scarlett
24 Mar 2006, 7:38 AM
Binders have covers and Mulberry is also a color.
on Indiscrete by ecargo
24 Mar 2006, 6:39 AM
An excellent write, tracking that unreachable, uncomfortable feeling after a one-night stand. (never had one myself, but my girlfriends have told me the emotions, much like the ones visually described here)..
on Take heart, you are closer than you know by Bobjim
8 Mar 2006, 2:10 PM
When I read this, I was humming along, as if written for a song. Enjoyed..
on Edges by Blue Magpie
23 Feb 2006, 3:13 PM
I absolutely LOVE the beginning of this - the first two lines especially. You could make it tight with the examples and less attempt on the rhyme ~ this could be a beauty.
on How Well I See by Blue Magpie
23 Feb 2006, 3:06 PM
For some reason, the Villanelle form scares the daylights out of me to attempt, but your poem flowed well and the repetition formed a circle around the meaning. Enjoyed and might inspire me to give the form a try!
on The Acorn Daisies by MacFrantic
23 Feb 2006, 2:44 PM
Written in the harsh climate of beauty. Enjoyed this very much!
replying on Watercolor Fairy by Scarlett
21 Feb 2006, 11:01 AM
Yes, "jostle" is better. And leave "a" out completely... Glad you liked the imagery. I love to paint with watercolors but you never know what it truly is going to look like till the next day, because it dries 20% lighter.. used to laugh and say that I had to wait for the watercolor fairy - hence the poem.
Thank you, Ranger, for your suggestions.
Thank you, Ranger, for your suggestions.
replying on Empty Chronicles by Scarlett
21 Feb 2006, 8:07 AM
Thanks for your encouragement, Ranger.
on A daisy chain for Nina by Caducus
21 Feb 2006, 8:05 AM
I'm sure I'm off base on this, especially given the comments following the poem.
But it seems to me that these are children throughout the entire poem.
She made a daisy chain, ah ~ that is sweet. I remember making flowers into necklaces when I was a young girl... but enough of that - brought back a lovely memory, 'tis all.
The marriage in the swamp is something children "play" at - playing house type of thing came to mind.
The headscarf - immediately made me think of cancer. Too many young face this and other children don't understand, they fear what's different...
The ache in the end, that she passed away ~ forever cherished, just as the chain is unending. Well, that's my ramblings...
But it seems to me that these are children throughout the entire poem.
She made a daisy chain, ah ~ that is sweet. I remember making flowers into necklaces when I was a young girl... but enough of that - brought back a lovely memory, 'tis all.
The marriage in the swamp is something children "play" at - playing house type of thing came to mind.
The headscarf - immediately made me think of cancer. Too many young face this and other children don't understand, they fear what's different...
The ache in the end, that she passed away ~ forever cherished, just as the chain is unending. Well, that's my ramblings...
replying on Empty Chronicles by Scarlett
21 Feb 2006, 7:41 AM
Whoops... I sure did hit the red "x". Thank you for explaining what happened. Lol. I didn't realize I could delete someone else's response. See there, learn something new every day.
I hate to disappoint, Ranger and the rest of my stuff is sad in comparison. But mayhap I'll take a chance. Enjoying the site thus far!
I hate to disappoint, Ranger and the rest of my stuff is sad in comparison. But mayhap I'll take a chance. Enjoying the site thus far!
on Sunday i will dream again by Caducus
21 Feb 2006, 7:35 AM
Whew.... the images that flood from this poem are impressive. The pain of a love lost has been penned before but this was unique. Thoroughly enjoyed.
on Tulips and Roses by Mona Lisa
21 Feb 2006, 7:27 AM
The beginning is lovely, makes me feel that this is a muse to you. An untouchable image of passion and the dream the desires to bloom in what "could have been." There is a break though, when the dream begins. This doesn't flow together as smoothly. Don't give up on this one!
on Empty Chronicles by Scarlett
21 Feb 2006, 7:18 AM
Sadly, this is the best of my work and for there on out - it's all down hill. Lol.. In the meantime, while my muse sleeps beneath a morning glory bloom, I'll browse around.
replying on Empty Chronicles by Scarlett
21 Feb 2006, 4:50 AM
Why, thank you, Ranger!