Re: The Order Of Things by Mr Pig	9-Jun-03/8:02 AM
Olve the atmospher, the old farmer and all... I think it's possibly a little too preciously descriptive for my tastes, especially the clouds, but I'm an curmudgeonly old puritan about things like adverbs and adjectives. The casual cruelty of the farmer is very Heathcliffian in a bathetic kind of way. A nice touch.
Re: Beam reach by INTRANSIT	9-Jun-03/7:49 AM
Very graceful (though watch spelling - 'futres'). Lovely alliteration of t and l in the middle stanza, you realy feel the tension and equilibrium there.
Re: a comment on Instructions to a Sculptor by Christof	4-Jun-03/6:30 AM
Your coments are always so complimentary, thank you. Your latest stuff has been really good. It's been great to watch you really wrestling with the idea of writing poetry over the last months.
Re: a comment on Final Comment by dougsoderstrom	27-May-03/9:15 AM
OK. You big shouty person! But my ears bleed after too much shouting, don't you care? Don't you? Damn the flowers, I couldn't give a dingo's kidney for them.
Re: An Ode to Anal Joy by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w	27-May-03/9:13 AM
'Smuggerly'- very good
Re: Tomorrow by Katie	27-May-03/9:07 AM
The best thing here is the line 'I have no time to lend or borrow' - reminds me of a folk song or something - but the idea of time as a commodity is surprisingly deep here.
Re: a comment on Final Comment by dougsoderstrom	27-May-03/5:54 AM
I can't stand it when people leave 'caps lock' on. Makes 'em sound like they're shouting.
Re: CHAMELEON by Jeremi B. Handrinos	13-May-03/9:28 AM
This is surely the work of our old friend Horus8? Hope you get your will back
Re: Cussedness by Nicholas Jones	13-May-03/9:22 AM
You have to admire Hobsbawm for that And I like this haiku, it made me chuckle. Chuckling is good and a very neglected art these days.
Re: Homecomings by Nicholas Jones	13-May-03/9:18 AM
The last 4 lines are really good, I agree, the rest just a little bald and declamatory.
Re: fuck that bitch by Lucifer	13-May-03/9:14 AM
Er, quite. Become a rap star maybe? Then you can spout this out and get to wear cool jewellery and stuff. Eek.
Re: Fighting erosion by INTRANSIT	13-May-03/4:21 AM
Good to see you at number 1, couldn't happen to a nicer guy. And in this poem you've really let yourself go ans surpassed yourself. The sounds are brilliant, the mystery deep and the feeling of the earth is strong and elemental. Really, this is great.
Re: Fighting erosion by INTRANSIT	13-May-03/4:21 AM
Good to see you at number 12, couldn't happen to a nicer guy. And in this poem you've really let yourself go ans surpassed yourself. The sounds are brilliant, the mystery deep and the feeling of the earth is strong and elemental. Really, this is great.
Re: The Blooding by Mr Pig	13-May-03/4:12 AM
This is more like it - a really singular poem, full of arresting images and visceral description. Your feelings of disgust and betrayal are palpable. Love the 'palsied old man'. Brilliant stuff
Re: Family Portrait by Mr Pig	13-May-03/4:06 AM
This would be great as prose, as it is the rhymes just make it all seem bathetic (the best lines are those where the boy reads Hemingway and the mother holds him close - non-rhyming and rhythmically perfect). The chess image is an interesting one which supports the theme of power.
Re: Down Lovers Lane by Mr Pig	13-May-03/4:01 AM
I think i agree with poet andknowit, there's soemthing too highly-wrought about this. i think if it relaxed more there would be more tnederness to it; as it is, it plays like a very artificial masquerade of love's conventions. Individual lines I like very much ('Alive in something sacred' is great) but altogether I feel it's too forced and sometimes melodramatic (our names carved in a diseased sycamore/ Memories never felt this cruel before' - further weakened by the facile rhyme). But there is something real here which I think you uncover elsewhere ('The Blooding').
Re: a comment on Blues by Christof	13-May-03/3:49 AM
I'd like to submit something soon but I have the mother of all writer's blocks! Just nothing is coming out at the moment that I would want to put out for other people to read. This always happens to me - six months on, a year off. Does it happen to anyone else?
Re: a comment on The Adulterous by Caducus	1-Apr-03/7:39 AM
I wear my lycra with glue, by the way, stops it slipping.
Re: a comment on The Adulterous by Caducus	1-Apr-03/7:39 AM
Very sorry, it's rude of me to interrupt. Do you find your ass is much coveted as a result?
Re: a comment on The Adulterous by Caducus	1-Apr-03/7:37 AM
I prefer to protest in all facetiousness