| Re: The Struggling Poet's Lament by Ranger |
smoofle 88.106.175.245 |
24-Feb-06/7:13 AM |
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I love it - but I think it needs tweaking, then I'll love it more. xxx
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| Re: Beauty, sleeping by Ranger |
smoofle 88.106.175.245 |
24-Feb-06/7:16 AM |
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This is still my favourite of your early stuff...
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Ranger 62.252.32.15 |
24-Feb-06/10:11 AM |
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Well you know just how much I love this one - in my eyes it looked better centrally aligned like you can on Word, but aligning on here isn't always simple.
I want parrot hair!
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| Re: last night was like the last one by hendrimike |
Ranger 62.252.32.15 |
24-Feb-06/10:25 AM |
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I quite liked the rhyming scheme although it would benefit from a little more invention - 'in/in', 'long/along' etc. don't really seem to be pushing your creative boundaries at all.
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| Re: Eden to Galillee (by Caducus) by Mona Lisa |
smoofle 88.106.175.245 |
24-Feb-06/10:46 AM |
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I rather like it, cunt and all...
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Dovina 69.175.32.104 |
24-Feb-06/10:53 AM |
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"to awaken the dust" - awakening dust
"The strangers" - strangers
"Firmly uninterested" - uninterssted
"boredom-faced" - bored-faced
"the classic" - classic
"the City" - city
"the more sedate" - sedate
"makes The roads tremble" - trembles the road
Okay, I'm picky!
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| Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222 |
smoofle 88.106.175.245 |
24-Feb-06/10:55 AM |
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| Re: Darker Days by oneglove |
Dovina 69.175.32.104 |
24-Feb-06/11:19 AM |
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Have you read "Savvy in the City: San Francisco" by Jane Young, especially page 4?
Steamer trunks of darker days, speaks of perhaps the Titanic, and twin saphires set in snow of perhaps a skull. I think of deep dives into ocean and memories and a good read.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
smoofle 88.106.175.245 |
24-Feb-06/11:35 AM |
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Like the poem, don't like the title
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| Re: Gaia and Man by Blue Magpie |
terbenaw 69.237.91.72 |
24-Feb-06/1:42 PM |
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I enjoyed this. It's a bit long, but for some reason, it seems to fit in it's current form. I like the creativity used with the end rhymes, but, I feel that it has limited the scope of the poem in some ways as well. All in all though... this is excellent.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
terbenaw 69.237.91.72 |
24-Feb-06/1:49 PM |
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I find this to be horrendous... I give you a 2 because it took mad bawls to come one here and post something like this. So you geta 2 - for sheer courage.
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| Re: On Looking Back by Dovina |
zodiac 209.193.18.26 |
24-Feb-06/3:04 PM |
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This so-called limerick doesn't use any "limerick words" at all. :-(
-not funny-
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| Re: On Looking Back by Dovina |
-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 86.135.203.170 |
24-Feb-06/4:54 PM |
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Racism 5 by Dovina
I once had a friend who was black.
I stabbed him eight times in the back.
He fell to the floor
And I stabbed him some more
Then pummelled his head with a jack.
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| Re: Goodbye by aamir_trichy |
aamir_trichy 203.129.195.149 |
24-Feb-06/10:55 PM |
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PLEASE PEOPLE LEAVE COMMENTS!!!! consider this ... i was sitting in my colleges net lab when i wrote this poem...1 hr ......was bored to hell...
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| Re: A smile by Bobjim |
Blue Magpie 212.205.251.48 |
24-Feb-06/11:09 PM |
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This might be a riddle, but can you explain to me what there is about it that makes it poetry.
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| Re: Pillosophy by Bobjim |
terbenaw 71.138.184.201 |
25-Feb-06/1:20 AM |
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A bit obscure don't you think? It might help if you elaborate a bit on what you mean. Also... can't a person support oneself with both pills and philosophy?
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| Re: My cousin by Bobjim |
terbenaw 71.138.184.201 |
25-Feb-06/1:20 AM |
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| Re: Ode to necrophilia by Bobjim |
terbenaw 71.138.184.201 |
25-Feb-06/1:24 AM |
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Are you trying to make the worst poem I've read? If so, you've succeeded. Besides the fact that the poem is sickening in its message, its design is shaky and crappy... I think I'm gonna go puke now.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
terbenaw 71.138.184.201 |
25-Feb-06/1:31 AM |
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The sestina is a difficult form to work with. With that said... This is an excellent sestina!! I shall study along with others to best figure out how to improve my sestina...
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| Re: Gaia and Man by Blue Magpie |
amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.37 |
25-Feb-06/3:05 AM |
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Too long for me at the moment.... will have to come back for it in a fresher frame of mind.
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