Re: Buddy by ALChemy	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	28-Mar-06/11:09 AM
'For my master runs not a finger through my hair'... Hmmm a nice ending to a lovely description. You're an abandoned old soul waiting desperately for His attention! If only I could put the scene I have in mind into words!
Re: Piano by Dovina	Scarlett 70.171.72.141	28-Mar-06/11:44 AM
I smiled with this read and loved the ending especially. I used to teach piano and laughed to think students might agree with the ending of this one.
Re: Sienna by oneglove	Scarlett 70.171.72.141	28-Mar-06/11:47 AM
Softly sings of seasons, as if ladies twirling around in a dance and changing partners (that of winter and fall). Enjoyed this!
Re: A look inside [someone real} by Garrett S Sexton	god'swife 71.103.98.44	28-Mar-06/6:10 PM
Well if the point of this so called poem is not to impress anyone this one succeeds. That little bio you give at the end(ABOUT THE ARTIST)is much closer to being poetry ABOUT THE ARTIST Jamie & Josh have split for good though she clings. He has slowly but gently has pushed her away. No kith nor kin, and a mind not unlike a ten year old. It was BIZARRE then that she dumped him. He now, being a nice chap, had the perfect escape. She had cancer young, nearly died, so is clingy to Mum. However, Mum and 3 half sisters (all by different dads) treat her like Cinderella. It's still a piece of crap but at least it flows better and is more interesting. "It's still a good poem because it's real" How the hell did you come up with this absurd notion? You don't have the first idea about poetry. The first line about the pencil is good.
Re: Behind the storm clouds, the moon consoles the sun.(edited) by ALChemy	god'swife 71.103.98.44	28-Mar-06/6:28 PM
The first line is very good. The next two lines are awful. Never us 'though' in a poem. It's theatrical and steals sincerity from everything it touches. This reads like a children's picture book. The penultimate line has a good metaphor, the storm being drowned out by wine. But again it's to ostentatious. I never heard of the moon being referred to as a child. Please explain.
Re: Behind the storm clouds, the moon consoles the sun.(edited) by ALChemy	Dovina 70.38.78.229	28-Mar-06/6:29 PM
Very aptly timed considering tomorrow's total eclipse, where the moon will block the sun in Africa. They are saying pregnant women should not look at the spectical or their babies will be born with hair lips. And your poem is the stuff of myth, too. If you had written it three thousand years ago, it might have given birth to gods.
Re: To Michelle by ALChemy	god'swife 71.103.98.44	28-Mar-06/6:32 PM
Are you at all interested in your poetry reflecting contemporary life, or are you affecting the role of a dandy purposefully? This is foppish.
regarding some deleted poem...	matt door 65.32.138.73	28-Mar-06/7:26 PM
Wow - I said "whatever" after I read this as well. Not your best by any means - but not truly bad. -7-
Re: Kristi's Quiescence by matt door	Dovina 70.38.78.229	28-Mar-06/7:29 PM
Poems for the last 300 years or more have expressed similar sentiments, but they are new for each new lover. Carry on, and try to make it as original as is possible with such a cloud of witnesses.
Re: My First Hangover by mindsigns	matt door 65.32.138.73	28-Mar-06/7:33 PM
Did'nt know Nick-at-Night was holding a poetry contest. This would win the 7th grade class by a hair.
Re: Time Thief by Dovina	matt door 65.32.138.73	28-Mar-06/7:42 PM
Parts of this are fairly good - other parts - really suck quite frankly. Keep posting, because you have talent, this piece just lacks it for the most part. Sorry.
regarding some deleted poem...	matt door 65.32.138.73	28-Mar-06/8:11 PM
Caducus - I took the time to actualy read this one - you did well I guess(though I hate to admit).A tad too abstract with some grammar gaffes. "noone - devils - devil's"
Re: Time Thief by Dovina	ecargo 167.219.88.140	29-Mar-06/7:13 AM
Good idea, but it's a little dull--Poor Richard's without the wit. The Danish cartoon reference is disconnected and a little silly.
Re: Kristi's Quiescence by matt door	ecargo 167.219.88.140	29-Mar-06/7:15 AM
Not bad, but it seems too familiar, done.
Re: Behind the storm clouds, the moon consoles the sun.(edited) by ALChemy	ecargo 167.219.88.140	29-Mar-06/7:17 AM
Comes off a little twee, Al, rather than tender.
regarding some deleted poem...	MacFrantic 204.98.2.23	29-Mar-06/10:54 AM
This is really good. I am astounded by the quality of your poetry. *9*
Re: Kristi's Quiescence by matt door	Garrett S Sexton 86.142.147.68	29-Mar-06/11:12 AM
A poem to last?
Re: A Melody by MacFrantic	Garrett S Sexton 86.142.147.68	29-Mar-06/11:49 AM
Unique character. Powerful form, slighly up it's own botty. 7
Re: Mirror by Sunny	Garrett S Sexton 86.142.147.68	29-Mar-06/11:58 AM
I love mirrors! Do you not? This takes all there magic away. Why? Whats with you, and ya appearance? HORRIBLE, JUST HORRIBLE! Am I taking this to seriously? 4
Re: The Ballad of Fraser Allonby Q.C., Barrister-At-Law by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w	Garrett S Sexton 86.142.147.68	29-Mar-06/12:05 PM
Hobbit poems R funny.