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Buddy (Free verse) by ALChemy
Even as I stroke the smooth fur capped scalp of Buddy, as his head sinks in servitude beneath the gentle weight of my hand, even as his eyes recline in glossy ecstasy as if to say you may snap my neck in a twist of your wrist and I shall die by your will a grateful sacrifice, even in the simple petting of a loyal dog I find my own life fails to be so full as that of this mongrel beneath my palm. For my master runs not a finger through my hair.

Up the ladder: dit da haiku
Down the ladder: Daddy

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Arithmetic Mean: 7.2
Weighted score: 6.1
Overall Rank: 1140
Posted: March 23, 2006 11:12 AM PST; Last modified: March 23, 2006 11:12 AM PST
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Comments:
[8] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 | 23-Mar-06/1:15 PM | Reply
Not even when the wind blows?

I liked this.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Ranger | 24-Mar-06/6:08 AM | Reply
I wear a hat alot. I figure if it's really God, the hat won't get in the way.
[8] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 > ALChemy | 24-Mar-06/1:23 PM | Reply
Depends what it's made of. Hmm, 'Godproof hats'...it's a niche market, certainly.
[n/a] ecargo @ 167.219.88.140 > Ranger | 24-Mar-06/1:29 PM | Reply
Re: Godproof hat--I'm wearing one right now. Improves the signal-to-noise ratio. And it's quite becoming.
[8] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 > ecargo | 24-Mar-06/1:47 PM | Reply
Becoming? I should hope so too! You wouldn't want God to have to look down on a shoddy piece of headwear now, would you?
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Ranger | 25-Mar-06/5:49 AM | Reply
Hurry up and copyright the name before I do.
[9] Dovina @ 70.38.78.229 > ALChemy | 25-Mar-06/11:49 AM | Reply
Too late. Already taken.

Godproof Hat by Dovina

Oh, for a hand on my cranial hair
In place of god’s that isn’t there
To protect from theistic wrath and such
Provide a gentle protective touch
Perhaps a goklike Buddhistic affair
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Dovina | 25-Mar-06/6:58 PM | Reply
Gokdamn you Dovina, I'm foiled again.
[9] Dovina @ 12.72.22.190 > ALChemy | 26-Mar-06/6:18 AM | Reply
Oh, you're no fun today. Here let me kick start your engine.

Godproof Hat by Alchemy

I used to think God was very large cat
With teeth in my neck like I were a rat
Then he kicked me outside
Where I hollered and cried
Now I wear a cat-skin hat
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Dovina | 26-Mar-06/9:54 AM | Reply
This is turning into the bearded Jesus limericks.

Here you go:

I once made a god-proof hat
like the one worn by Arafat
Now I work at 7-11s
and Highjack 747s
'guess numbers are really where it's at.

[9] Dovina @ 12.72.25.146 > ALChemy | 26-Mar-06/5:22 PM | Reply
I hope it never gets bearded with baggage like that one. And numbers in heaven are where it's at. 747 is a cool, dislexic number. 25 is not, when it's a sign, and you're driving 52.
[n/a] zodiac @ 209.193.14.98 > Dovina | 26-Mar-06/11:23 PM | Reply
Good thing there aren't letters in heaven like there are numbers. Botching "dyslexic" would surely kill your chances with the Eternal Y.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Dovina | 27-Mar-06/12:16 AM | Reply
I think you mean a palindrome number. A dyslexic is more likely to see L4L than 747. I'd drive 52 in a 25 zone whether I was dyslexic or not.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > ALChemy | 27-Mar-06/12:35 AM | Reply
Maybe I should convert to Islam. Allah is so much easier for a dyslexic. I suppose I could refer to the Christian god as "Am I that, am I?" or pronounce Jesus as Sausage but that's a mouthful or maybe I could put on my Sean-Johns and walk up to the lord like "Yo, what up Dog?"
[9] Dovina @ 12.72.25.31 > ALChemy | 27-Mar-06/6:29 AM | Reply
lol. Glad I'm not cixelsid or rellepssim. Caidoz will say I'm htob.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Dovina | 27-Mar-06/6:55 AM | Reply
You're styll one, M'i llits eht rehto.
[9] Dovina @ 12.72.25.31 > ALChemy | 27-Mar-06/7:00 AM | Reply
pey, os ti meees
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Dovina | 27-Mar-06/11:34 AM | Reply
Now you're both it seeem.
[9] lmp @ 141.154.134.3 > ALChemy | 18-Apr-06/3:09 PM | Reply
*this i read in a book, so i take no credit*

ever hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac?
used to lay in bed at night wondering if there really was a dog.

you guys are a scream. why can't we have a live chat room?
[9] Dovina @ 12.72.34.116 > lmp | 18-Apr-06/3:26 PM | Reply
We do, but it's usually empty. You can go there and talk to yourself and argue back.
[9] lmp @ 141.154.134.3 > Dovina | 28-Jun-07/11:10 AM | Reply
i got no answer. that was interesting.
[8] amanda_dcosta @ 203.145.159.44 > ALChemy | 28-Mar-06/11:13 AM | Reply
I once made a god-proof hat
like the one worn by arafat
Now I work at 7-11s
my name's 007
and hijacking's what I'm at.
[9] lmp @ 141.154.134.3 > Dovina | 18-Apr-06/3:18 PM | Reply
*warning - ignorant-speak version*

oh! wearin' a god-proof lid
be the best thing i eva did.
ain't nobody can tell
that _my_ "do" ain't gelled
especially the preacher's kid.

[9] INTRANSIT @ 205.188.117.10 | 23-Mar-06/1:37 PM | Reply
Forgive your master. he's had a severe case of hammertoe and is busy cutting snowflakes at the moment.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > INTRANSIT | 24-Mar-06/6:09 AM | Reply
Is that on his answering machine?
[9] Dovina @ 70.38.78.229 | 23-Mar-06/3:01 PM | Reply
Yes, you've done it. Perfect ending. It's enough to make a bible-thumper take another look.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > Dovina | 24-Mar-06/6:12 AM | Reply
It's my first draft so it's a little ruff (Get it,"Ruff"?:)hehehehe...
[8] amanda_dcosta @ 203.145.159.44 | 28-Mar-06/11:09 AM | Reply
'For my master runs not a finger through my hair'... Hmmm a nice ending to a lovely description. You're an abandoned old soul waiting desperately for His attention! If only I could put the scene I have in mind into words!
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > amanda_dcosta | 28-Mar-06/5:15 PM | Reply
It'll come to you soon enough. You'll see your symbol somewhere in something.
[9] lmp @ 141.154.134.3 | 18-Apr-06/3:07 PM | Reply
wow. this reminds me of a sappy yet somehow tearjerkish poem i read once about the dog as the ever willing servant to the master, licking the hand that beats him, and so on.

but, the last line clinches it. the plot twist. leading us along a stray thread only to tie it all in at the end. very nice.

however, maybe your master *does* run fingers through your hair, but not literally (oh that's good, since we speak on the written word!).

very good.
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