Re: to my best friend david by wowzers718	24-Oct-03/7:39 PM
Are you Crystal Lane Swift in disguise?
Re: a comment on Shadows by tori	24-Oct-03/7:12 PM
And Miggy would know!!!!!!!
Re: rainfall saga 7 by Bill Z Bub	24-Oct-03/6:27 PM
What the hell did you guys smoke in Niagara? Was it you that jumped the falls and survived. Did you bang your head? Did you?
Re: a comment on rainfall saga 1 by Bill Z Bub	24-Oct-03/6:21 PM
yeah, like a poem!
Re: Nothing beat the 90's for An over view of American culture by Shardik	24-Oct-03/6:14 PM
Rather straight forward and not wholly original by any means, but not bad. I would curb the didactic diddling toward the end.
Re: a comment on Toku by Bill Z Bub	21-Oct-03/9:45 PM
Toku sounds Japanese or a shortened version of such, not primal, unless you think Asian names in their guttural stress patterns come of in a prehistoric or ancient fashion. I am not sure it does. You are correct in one aspect. We are discussing issues in the poem, as we did in the other of issues that do not merit debate. If you are good with the poem, okay. But frankly I think it could use more Toku and less NATURE. The idea is good, and you filling in the perceptions are good, but I am not so sure the poem is in this state. Just an opinion. And Maiden sounds odd even though I know it fits into a kings and queens primal sense. I’d rather debate you poems. They are closer to being finished.
Re: a comment on Toku by Bill Z Bub	21-Oct-03/7:58 PM
And what the hell is the Maiden? Nature? If so, that is funny.
Re: a comment on Toku by Bill Z Bub	21-Oct-03/7:57 PM
I disagree with you and hatter's hare. Bub and Richa I think fall into the same category, although the bub utilizes more concrete language. Their poems are fragmented. Well thought out in their heads, but incomplete at times on paper. You can disagree all you want, but the fact is the picture makes the poem make sense. Look at some of the other comments. We don’t know who Toku is thus the exuberance is nil. You simply mentioning a name and screaming out NATURE in my mind doesn’t complete the poem or capture completely the rawness of the moment. With the picture I see who this guy is and the body langue in the photos, etc, etc, that isn’t in the poem. The image could be more complete.
Re: lame ass shit by FreeFormFixation	21-Oct-03/7:54 PM
See the Bitch! poem comment of using a title as a final tag line and ultimately a young cop out for a poem that would probably work better as a lyric.
Re: a comment on Toku by Bill Z Bub	21-Oct-03/7:51 PM
ROBERT Bly is a goof.
Re: a comment on Toku by Bill Z Bub	21-Oct-03/7:37 PM
Iron John is a book by Robert Bly. The other point stands.
Re: bitch! by Freethinker1602	21-Oct-03/7:21 PM
Is this a poem or simply a collection of statements with a tag line at the end? I need to know.
Re: Toku by Bill Z Bub	21-Oct-03/7:16 PM
The fact that Z has to send/post a picture of the event for the poem to really to take hold hurts the poem. Maybe you could give the reader just a bit more to make it make sense of what and why it (i.e. “Nature” is being said. I am afraid that the name just doesn’t cut it. Of course, I am sure hatter’s hare will disagree, but what does she know, she only drinks pilsner. I think we get that idea when we look at the picture, but alone I think the poem fails. Initially I was afraid you had holed up in the john with a tattered copy of “Iron John”.
Re: Evel Knievel's last bananna split    by horus8	21-Oct-03/7:11 PM
Daring!!!!! Original!~!!! Super!!!!
Re: Mr. America (Hunting Season) by SupremeDreamer	21-Oct-03/7:10 PM
Considering it is painfully obvious from your imagery that you have never hunted before and are relying of clichéd observations from your past and maybe the dictionary, the fact that you use it as the base metaphor for what you are trying to say is, how I should put this, ridiculous. Thanks for you time. Rally other than that it is quite lovely. And such original thinking.
Re: You'd sell more hats, mugs, and shirts if they said... by Shardik	20-Oct-03/10:42 PM
So what.
Re: a comment on Drug Addict by SupremeDreamer	20-Oct-03/10:39 PM
"self pity is cliche ridden" is a fallacy. "sarcasm hasnt been as viciouse untill you came along" - I have always been here.
Re: When I say I'm a 14 yr old girl I mean 75 year old man by Shardik	20-Oct-03/10:04 PM
Cutting edge!!!!!!!! Super!!!!!!
Re: Decay by INTRANSIT	20-Oct-03/9:50 PM
Beat us over the head. Go ahead. Beat us.
Re: a comment on Drug Addict by SupremeDreamer	20-Oct-03/2:38 PM
Have Mr. Fire put it to work and I shall.