| Re: Questions to the Unknown by Mephisto |
22-Aug-02/5:58 PM |
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Keep trying, your soul is headed down the path of happiness. Read some Buddha parables if you haven't already. I bet your a fine young man. But I still have to give your poem a 3/10. I've got grown up appetites
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| Re: Summer Son by Frass |
22-Aug-02/5:41 PM |
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Cheers! Heres to you and your family, may you be blessed with many years of joy and health.That son of your's will teach you more about poetry then any of us could. Work on this, it's almost there. Just tighten the bolts alittle. Isn't it amazing to be a father! I bet you race home just to look at him.
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| Re: Window poems by kawakurdi |
22-Aug-02/5:32 PM |
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edit edit edit edit i can not say it enough. most of these sentences can be pared down to 3-5 words and the poem would be much better for it.
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| Re: Reflected, Dreamed by Frass |
22-Aug-02/5:28 PM |
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Cheers! I don't know what thiws is about but it's well done a that's what counts. Although I can never get use to sentences being turned on their behinds for sake of a rhymn. (fromdeepisgleaned,isupwardbeamed)how about deeply gleaned and upwardly beamed.
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| Re: saving myself for marriage by Venus |
22-Aug-02/3:17 PM |
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yes my dear, but why is it broken, I mean f**king it won't break anything.
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| Re: Life On Earth by dougsoderstrom |
22-Aug-02/3:15 PM |
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There is no way out, you are right we're all bound towards death. But that's something a 5 year old discovers. Make this work, focus on some specific experience or moment which made you feel this, and write about the experience, not the philosophy
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| Re: saving myself for marriage by Venus |
22-Aug-02/3:00 PM |
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improved but still needs a little more salt, or maybe some garlic. Why is your starfish broken, exactly?
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| Re: aphelion by DespondentDotCom |
22-Aug-02/2:57 PM |
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| Re: Titanic by DespondentDotCom |
22-Aug-02/2:55 PM |
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| Re: Titanic by DespondentDotCom |
22-Aug-02/2:55 PM |
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| Re: Dark Lady by quantumenterprises |
22-Aug-02/2:50 PM |
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Your hyper-poeticising is ok here because it's to an inanimate object, which makes it humouress.
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| Re: Falling... by quantumenterprises |
22-Aug-02/2:45 PM |
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this takes a quantum leap into to the realm of saccharinity. 'Oh life bizarre'?... Oh poem bizarre! Keep it real for the peeps. Settle down a little and speak to us as if you were telling yourself something important about yourself. Good luck
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| Re: Gilded Stumps of Olde (AN STORY THAT IS NOT AN POEME) by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. |
22-Aug-02/2:34 PM |
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Best story I've read in a long time. Great composition. It's complicated but there's no meandering. I think this would make a great kid's book. I know my 11 year old would piss his pants laughing and squealing with joy. I respect your ability to create great humor. Funny. 10/10
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| Re: Awesome Heir by Shin-Bojangles |
22-Aug-02/1:49 PM |
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Fart Angel you're a dick and a pussy.
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| Re: Awesome Heir by Shin-Bojangles |
22-Aug-02/10:55 AM |
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oops i forgot to sum it all up. I have female sex organs. My gender is female. If I identify with males I may consider my self a male but my actual gender remaions female. Ican havr my clit surgically inlarge but I can't have my vagina sewn shut enless I have my reproductive organs removed. Which can be done but is exceedingly rare. My chromosones will remain XX so clinically my gender is still female. Gender is a clinical word. Identity is used in the socio/psycho construct.
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| Re: Awesome Heir by Shin-Bojangles |
22-Aug-02/10:46 AM |
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you are a bright boy. You've got it almost right, and since we don't talk about sexuality openly in our culture you get extra special praise for even attempting to understand. Here goes. Our gender is determined at the time of our birth by our sex organs. the dr. looks down and says this kids got a willy he's a he. But occasionally mistake are made. Their is our orientation which is either hetero, homo, or bi. There is our identity which lies on a continuum between male and female. For example I may have male sex organs but identify with females and consider my self as such. Or vice versa. Androgenous people identify with both groups and are the happiest. There is also a genetic identity XX girl XY boy. Verey rarely there are males who have XX chromosones but only there genetic specialist knows their little secret you would not be able to tell either upclose our at a distance. Elves are another story. I know thy are as a rule adrogenous at least the tolkien kind, but I've never seen their plumbing.
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| Re: Awesome Heir by Shin-Bojangles |
22-Aug-02/9:54 AM |
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Monsieur Bojangles, It does not matter how many nerdlings love Mr Tolkiens trilogy. It is still ubscure and inless you read it at a star trek convention most will not understand. I do believe in elves though.
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| Re: Awesome Heir by Shin-Bojangles |
22-Aug-02/9:47 AM |
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Sex organs are classified as either male or female or both. that's how it's done you idiots. I happen to have a degree in guess what? sexuality. It's what i do professionally (and as a hobby). I'm serious it's what I talk about all day long. Any questions? My dog are you folks un-informed. i mean this is basic you boy me girl why? because you have a penis and testicles and I have a vagina, uterus, and clitoris etc., when the coroner cuts you open and takes a look at your insides he will speak into the tape-recorder and say; reproductive organs female and/or male.
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| Re: Various 7-Eleven hold ups... by Bachus |
22-Aug-02/9:35 AM |
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This haiku thing is perfect for you. Your so brilliant that limiting you verbage helps us nincumpoops to comprehend your genius a little better. You know cause otherwise it's like starring into the sun 10/10
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| Re: domination by midnight |
22-Aug-02/9:28 AM |
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great thoughts. really. Lot's of potentional. now write a poem about it. See Christof or babbitt for examples
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