on Try, Please Try by Spindle
29 Mar 2004, 5:45 PM
Points for hitting a universal emotion.
on some deleted poem
29 Mar 2004, 11:26 PM
Not bad H, not bad at all.
on Another Fucking Slow, Sad Song by wilco
29 Mar 2004, 11:30 PM
yep. sure is.
on A Flower for Monet by Shuushin
30 Mar 2004, 10:53 AM
HEY guys, THANKS. Been in training most of the day and I popped out to check messages - horry cow.
Thanks for the good words - much appreciated!!
Thanks for the good words - much appreciated!!
on Once Upon A Time ( a senyru ) by Mr Pig
30 Mar 2004, 11:18 AM
a thousand points for calling a duck a duck (senryu vs haiku).
tanka you.
tanka you.
on I Married an Infectious Woman (My Love, 'Futility') by SupremeDreamer
31 Mar 2004, 5:33 PM
I like "mayhaps".
I guess I'm not much into more ass humor at the moment. It goes together well enough.
I guess I'm not much into more ass humor at the moment. It goes together well enough.
on Bread Wine And Chocolate by Caducus
31 Mar 2004, 5:34 PM
A reference to easter?
on Darkness Falls On Tenement Twelve by Mona Lisa
31 Mar 2004, 5:37 PM
I will like this so much more when it has the word "concrete" in it only once.
Watch your preposition use; too much - especially with so many conjunctions (but/yet).
Pretty solid sentiment just the same though.
Watch your preposition use; too much - especially with so many conjunctions (but/yet).
Pretty solid sentiment just the same though.
on A country called Cha by richa
31 Mar 2004, 5:49 PM
Richa mein freund - I grow familiar with your Australian abstractions; good stuff.
nits-
"beared"? bore?
"entered the picture" - seems like a missed poetic opportunity.
nits-
"beared"? bore?
"entered the picture" - seems like a missed poetic opportunity.
on Ideals drown Worries by skaskowski
31 Mar 2004, 5:53 PM
well done - okay, I don't like "sticky" with "Stuck".
Have a ten anyway.
Have a ten anyway.
Pretty nice, calliope.
This is an entirely different style (etc.), but have you read "the old fools" by philip larkin?
http://plagiarist.com/poetry/?wid=4879
oh, I just read baughworm's crit on the title - agreed.
This is an entirely different style (etc.), but have you read "the old fools" by philip larkin?
http://plagiarist.com/poetry/?wid=4879
oh, I just read baughworm's crit on the title - agreed.
on some deleted poem
31 Mar 2004, 6:06 PM
Good thought.
on Twilight Affair by thepinkbunnyofdoom
31 Mar 2004, 6:12 PM
"opera of obscenities" - nice.
Yes, an edit once the emotion has leveled out a bit would be good for it; a nice distillation.
Yes, an edit once the emotion has leveled out a bit would be good for it; a nice distillation.
on some deleted poem
31 Mar 2004, 6:22 PM
have a 10.
on The Hell With Growing Up by wilco
31 Mar 2004, 8:01 PM
I think it represents a good snapshot of a frame of mind in the moment just before one "grows up" (whatever that is) - this exact feeling.
You may be surprised, and perhaps relieved, to know that there is still a bit to go and you won't spend your entire life wishing for misspent youth.
As a slight aside, there is a recent study where folks aged 65 and older were asked what their favorite age was - 40-41 was the most cited result.
You may be surprised, and perhaps relieved, to know that there is still a bit to go and you won't spend your entire life wishing for misspent youth.
As a slight aside, there is a recent study where folks aged 65 and older were asked what their favorite age was - 40-41 was the most cited result.
on Astronomical by DeadtotheWorld
31 Mar 2004, 8:02 PM
I'm sorry but I have trouble with the format. Enought that I have trouble getting through it.
I think it might have something to do with the sushi I just had.
I think it might have something to do with the sushi I just had.
on Tuna and sweetcorn by Bobjim
31 Mar 2004, 8:03 PM
woah. thats deep.
on some deleted poem
31 Mar 2004, 8:06 PM
nice line: "wheat
in a ruckus with the wind"
This one _really_ slows time.
in a ruckus with the wind"
This one _really_ slows time.