| Re: A Day, Wasted by Joyleaf |
29-Jan-03/5:24 PM |
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Been there done that and i like this one. So i give you an dime.
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| Re: A Green Moons Haze by pink_punk_kisses87 |
29-Jan-03/5:29 PM |
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I agree its a ten but you might change threw to through. It'd make it so that someone didn't mentally trip over your words, unless that was what you were going for.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
30-Jan-03/5:04 PM |
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I like what I see. It has real potental and no I'm not going to say it needs depth. I think it just needs to be longer.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
31-Jan-03/9:00 AM |
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This one is pretty dull even for a real life occurance
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| Re: Equality by Freethinker1602 |
31-Jan-03/12:09 PM |
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I know I don't have any room to talk but I don't know the "so run far and pray your feet be swift be quick witted" just Doesn't seem to fit in well.
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| Re: Elegy by Quarton |
31-Jan-03/12:13 PM |
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Only one word is needed to describe this. Good!
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| Re: Jesus rides the comet by Shardik |
31-Jan-03/12:17 PM |
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Got to agree with razorgrin this is quite swell.
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| Re: Because The Ground Is Still Frozen by razorgrin |
31-Jan-03/4:47 PM |
Next time try
Drinking Vodka
open cupboard, grab bottle
sit back and enjoy
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| Re: A Little Nightmare by Teen14 |
31-Jan-03/4:52 PM |
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Your close to caputing it but maybe a few less gomez runs at the beginning so that you build a sort of increasing frenzy.
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| Re: Cant sleep, clown will eat me.(A poem about clowns) by lunar |
1-Feb-03/1:20 PM |
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This is Great. Almost funnier than the T-Shirt.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
1-Feb-03/1:38 PM |
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Ending needs reworked but i really liked the "stomach punched hangover"
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| Re: Life by marvelis |
1-Feb-03/2:24 PM |
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Uh??? I've read this Over and over again and it just doesn't make much sense to me. -3-
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| Re: Great Waters of End by marvelis |
1-Feb-03/2:34 PM |
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This seems like a longer version of life. Which wouldn't be so bad but It feels like your just saying the same things over and over again. -5- Try making this shorter or life longer.
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| Re: Confession by marvelis |
1-Feb-03/2:37 PM |
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Much better than your other two. -9-
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
1-Feb-03/2:43 PM |
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Sad. Just Sad. Hope this cheers you up. -10-
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| Re: Impossibilities, and Marvel Comical Heroes. by Bachus |
1-Feb-03/2:51 PM |
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Ahahahahahahahahahahaha. Wait nope Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha still funny.
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| Re: Dancers of the Night by Teen14 |
1-Feb-03/3:00 PM |
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Wait smoke wants darkness to end? Smoke causes Darkness. Other than that i like it -7-
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| Re: Run Forest! Run... by Bachus |
1-Feb-03/3:03 PM |
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Hehehehe Thats twice in one day you made me laugh. -8-
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
1-Feb-03/3:08 PM |
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| Re: Slow motion by INTRANSIT |
1-Feb-03/7:28 PM |
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Makes a good poening to a story but not much of a poem by itself. It needs more. I'll vote when you add to it.
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