Re: surgical spite by calliope	29-May-07/5:55 AM
I get the feel of emo - but the cuz in the last line doesn't fit with the rest of the write. You could lose it and keep with the darkness, it lightens the write too much - almost childish.
regarding some deleted poem...	29-May-07/6:01 AM
don't like this...too bland and matter-of-fact
Re: Close your eyes but keep your mind wide open by darylchew	29-May-07/6:07 AM
(I'm sorry, that seat is taken.) great line - work back from there and shorten your sentences - pull it all in tight and the image will just pop...
regarding some deleted poem...	29-May-07/6:09 AM
LOL...nice! the wonderous sofa-shaped arse
Re: Rolling Bells by MacFrantic	31-May-07/9:07 AM
molesting - dragging - torturing, and all things associated with the living...so visual here. Still not entirely sure this has clicked in its meaning with me, but I get lost in the movement within.
Re: Delicious Ann and the Magic Ham (Prose...I'm ashamed) by D. $ Fontera	31-May-07/9:12 AM
Don't know why I like this...
Re: Sunset Beach by amanda_dcosta	31-May-07/9:22 AM
I do love to think in colour - but I can't get the image out of my head of seagulls with nice white teeth!
Re: The Story of Wolf and Moon by Blackshadow	31-May-07/9:27 AM
Love the story - but the spacing distracted me a little
Re: Alive at 95 by nypoet22	31-May-07/9:34 AM
first two stanzas set me up with a rhythm, and the last three tripped me up a little...
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Jun-07/6:05 PM
Now this you can get your mind into...nice!
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Jun-07/6:15 PM
nice grab on challenges...
Re: Call Someone Right Away by jessicazee	7-Jun-07/3:44 PM
Pretty funny - darkly so, but a fair and just thankyou to your rescuer.
regarding some deleted poem...	7-Jun-07/3:51 PM
The Bee Gee's stayin' Alive came rushing to my head when I first read this. It has a very 70's feel to it, maybe it's because all the guys' stash was so very much on show back then.
Re: No-Strings by sca	7-Jun-07/4:02 PM
Some great lines - not sure about the third stanza, doesn't really speak of the rebel, just some things that sound kinda rebellious.
Re: Cephalonia by Caducus	7-Jun-07/4:10 PM
For some hollywood reason I was wanting her to have been the one who killed him, for moaning about her bread. Is that what was meant or is the first stanza a little misleading? Or am I just being twisted?
Re: Stripes by JMakStak	7-Jun-07/4:13 PM
The language is brilliant.
Re: The kissing chair incident by Stephen Robins	7-Jun-07/4:17 PM
Blackpool? Great little tale - true story? Surely there has been a ban on those suits of shell for years! I feel this wibbles and wobbles in places, could be tighter.
regarding some deleted poem...	7-Jun-07/4:26 PM
Not sure about the context but I feel there are too many 'i' sounds in the one area. The last line - make me fly toward you or make me fly to where you are. I'm no expert on english but the way you wrote it doesn't seem to fit right. Could just be me, wouldn't be the first time. This seems fairly dark and for that I like it.
regarding some deleted poem...	11-Jun-07/3:50 PM
I always thought old peoples bones just kinda crumbled, learned something today.
Re: Dixon Country Store, Kentucky by Dovina	11-Jun-07/3:57 PM
I like this especially the last stanza, it has quite a lazy feel to it, and I found it quite a matter-of-fact read. Like I guess they take whatever comes along as part of their life.