on purple by youngweirdo
6 Sep 2002, 8:01 AM
Belive me I'm not trying to bring the blackness to your life Doylum. But I can't help it if the overarching darkness of life is so bleakly apparent today. Perhaps it is the end.
on Forbidden Love by beakism
6 Sep 2002, 7:59 AM
Normally I quite like bathos but the last line here is just a step too far. But this is pretty darn good
on purple by youngweirdo
6 Sep 2002, 7:48 AM
Turtle. That's the closest I can get. But really, who cares?
on School (a sonnet) by Nicholas Jones
6 Sep 2002, 7:46 AM
I think we'll have to agree to disagree. School isn't perfect, but the alternative is mass illiteracy and the end of civilisation. Or something.
on Life's Great Irony by Tascobar
6 Sep 2002, 7:34 AM
This is quite funny. Yep.
on Remembrance by dragonfly
6 Sep 2002, 3:25 AM
I like the regretful tone of this, but 'Like if it were yesterday' is ungrammatical - 'As if it were yesterday' would be right. 'Handing me' is curious as well - handing you something? Touching you? It's quite a nice phrase.
on Evensong by Nicholas Jones
6 Sep 2002, 3:20 AM
Black black it's all black.
on Evensong by Nicholas Jones
6 Sep 2002, 2:39 AM
I prefer nothingness to belief in a myth. Or rather, I believe in humanity and the universe rather than an external god. But this poem is good because it raises this debate; it is individual and provocative.
on i would have you by silvertongueddevil
5 Sep 2002, 9:50 AM
I like this a lot - very suggestive and poised
on Do Swans Get Jealous? (#2) by Christof
4 Sep 2002, 5:43 AM
In the crowded parks in central London you don't have much choice.....
on Walk With Me by Ojiboch
4 Sep 2002, 4:25 AM
I like this, it has a real freshness
on The United Fates Of America by Lenore
4 Sep 2002, 1:51 AM
It is very interesting, as an Englishman, to read an American view of America. I don't know if a lot of Americans really know how their country is viewed by a large part of the rest of the world, but this poem at least shows real awareness. All great Empires crumble eventually - it happened to Rome, it happened to Britain... The only quibble I have is that I don't think that he with the 'heart of ice', whom I take to be Osama Bin Laden, is either cold-hearted or hungry for power - I think he is extremely hot in his passions and not hungry for power for himself but rather fixated on removing the power of his enemies.
on Melancholia by vulcan
4 Sep 2002, 1:37 AM
I think this goes beyond Melancholia - it is a baldly stated death wish! But the phrasing is strong and , as always, your metre is powerful.
on She Thinks Of Men Waiting by Christof
4 Sep 2002, 1:04 AM
Good grief. I obviously went home too early yesterday. If I'd hung on a bit I could've joined in with you lot. I was just in the mood too. What a sexed up place this is.
on The Hand of God by Christof
3 Sep 2002, 8:41 AM
It's good to be an island of Englishness, although I think I miss out on a lot of references. It's an education. Glad you liked the poem.
on The Stifling Moment by vulcan
3 Sep 2002, 7:59 AM
And sorry for 'dmamn' - I meant 'damn'. This is great anyway.
on The Stifling Moment by vulcan
3 Sep 2002, 7:53 AM
You yourself have written a mean dmamn pice of poetry here. You can hear that hush.
on She Thinks Of Men Waiting by Christof
3 Sep 2002, 7:51 AM
Thanks Vulcan that means a lot. And best wishes to you!
on School (a sonnet) by Nicholas Jones
3 Sep 2002, 7:20 AM
But I take it you learnt sonnet structure at school - so it wasn't all pointless then was it? Again, I can't agree with your conclusion, and I think this is melodramatic at the end and no half as interesting as 'Evensong'.
on Evensong by Nicholas Jones
3 Sep 2002, 7:12 AM
I don't agree with your conclusion. Of course we have an alternative - we don't have to belive in god or the Trinity if it seems untrue. But I believe it is true to you and your poem makes this clear. Some of it sounds like cut-up prose ('And the hymns/were disappointingly insipid.' - I don't catch any rhythm there) but the opening is very atmospheric - probably the best bit of the poem. This is a very interesting poem, plenty to think about.