ALChemy
replying on Shoebox Thoughts by BrandonW
6 Dec 2005, 12:59 PM
Yeah right, the E is silent.
I count wondering as two syllables
Yes, my belssings are duely counted. I saw a flatbed with a little toy fire engine strapped neatly to the otherwise empty bed
and wondered if it was you going home for the holidays.
Wrong on all three counts as usual. Happy Holidays!
Actually he's too big to go in the laundry. "Would he'd fit" is Irish for "I would that he would fit."
Merry Christmas, Al, but your poem is blasphemous!
God awaits you Zodiac.
http://www.scouting.nl/static/illualto/j ungle04.gif
"Trusssst in meeee, jusssst in meee."
It's fairly true to the form of a hymn. By calling it a lyric or a ballad or anything that implies that it might be sung it will increase your chances of getting a good vote for a mediocre poem.
http://poetry.allinfo-about.com/
http://www.poetrypower.com/poetry.htm
Best links I could find so far. Knowing what is what can only make your poetry better which is pretty good so far I might add.
Alchemy, to be frank, i don't know what is characteristic of a lyric, or limmerick, or ballad, or haiku/haiki (or whatever it is called). I write as i feel and don't bother about the type, though i guess it would be nice to know what is what.
I'm a bit curious..... How much do you know 'bout Goa. At the moment i'm in transition here. would be interesting to note your insight.
I think you will find it interesting to note that (Ref: 5 loaves & 2 fish), metaphorically speaking, they experienced a deep thirst in their hearts and were at a point where they would do anything to quench their thirsting spirits ( desert phase), that they were willing to even think about trimming their ways. No doubt there is no ref. to desert, but doesn't your heart too feel the dryness and yearning for life, to rebloom with freshness and vitality sometime or the other..... whether you wish to admit it or not.
Note that Jesus came and refreshed not only their spirits, but in the bargain He also satisfied their bodily need for food.
So take delight in Him and He will give you all your hearts desires.
Need I say more, brother?
Thanks for your input. Makes me rethink my own words....
I AGREE.
www.utopiawright.com
Not at the moment unfortunately. The church sounds wonderful, but didn't spend much tiem around Puebla. More Oaxaca and Chiapas way.
which definition did you intend for this poem?
Yeah, It's suppose to bounce off "formaldehyde" in meaning and in rhyme. A case of a little sacrifice of substance for sound.
Thanks Cad. Let me know if you come up with any suggestions.
Consider yourself luckey. Santa might have sent you the Snuggle bear. Or a Lobster.
I have no idea of hte complexities of a triolet but the word play was inspiring and parts reminded me of Frost.
One of the best I've read in a while on here.
PS-Are you still in Mexico? Do you know the carved church at Tonantzintla, near Cholula, Puebla?
http://tinyurl.com/aunyl
http://tinyurl.com/8k3g6
Wow, I like your poem. It reminds me of a game that I used to play at my grandmother's house when I was a kid - she had a small statue of Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson standing over a dead body - weird I know - and underneath was the caption 'Are we too late Watson?'. I sed to enjoy putting teh words back to front etc etc:
Too late Watson are we
Too late Watson we are
we too late are Watson
Are late too Watson we
etc. etc.
I like this, but I'm not sure about the nursery rhyme sing song quality of the rhyme - maybe blank verse would be a better restraint? Also I don't like the way that our heroine is left in the dark at the end. Couldn't she hit Hyde over the head with a saucepan and escape or something?