its funny.

that's was good ..

look up: more than i bargained for.

Do you think/feel it is somehow your duty to guide those who follow your work? Picked up O.B. o A. P. Spot on, as usual.

Sounds like a threnody.

And when it happens in a public facility?

I look into his eyes and I'm tossed and bound I bury my face into her breast and want to masterbate and live forever I kiss her lips and pull away just so I can suck ass again.

Sounds like an angry prayer. How is your death avenged?

What is wrong with you?Was this an ode to yourself? Either way it really - truly sucks!Are you a confused 13 year old who's been molested by a gang of Eagle Scouts?Try something besides poetry for your venting. Considering this ranting poem,I believe your the mayor of Dimsville!

Thought of back when and salt blue ocean....very nice.

don't know what to think for sure. the style is new to me, and it seems a bit forced in places. Overall a good pome tho'

From my POV there are less than 32 truths here and more than one lie. Still, it's a nice collection of sayings and could-be-trues.

I read this yesterday and did not comment because I did not understand what you are saying. Perhaps you are holding a criminal who will soon be executed. Perhaps the person is terminally ill. Something is urgent in time, but what?

Foetal rage from beyond the grave is a touching topic. And the yoda-like dialogue - "forgotten, I will be" - was a nice touch. Shame about the "all lower case" and "arbitrary line breaks", though :( -10-

I love the idea of being camels, ready with water for the long haul. It's less clear how (this) is a combination lock. "The rock sits still and quiet letting the rain erode, both becoming mud." is a great line.

Did you get these last two right? If I were your shrink, I would first laugh at the humor in this and wonder if it’s a joke. Then I would wonder why you knew these were mistakes only after doing them. And then the next logical question, “Will he think the last two are also mistakes after he pays for the beer his friend offered to pay for and believed her when she implied he wrote a poem on toilet paper and wiped with her poem.

i like this poem it's really good

very good ..that's a nice poem

The answer to the question your poem asks is not in churches it is true. It's not in the sky nor in the forests either. Maybe it's in RLS's Requiem "Home is the sailor, home from the sea, And the hunter home from the hill." Or Donne's(?)" Glad did I live/And gladly die/And I lay myself down with a will." Good thought-provoking poem. One point better than your personal average. -10-

Always raising the bar, indeed. If you ever failed me in that, I wouldn't drive constantly onwards for the next twilight horizon-- it wouldn't be as fun or freakish otherwise. The book stanza was the best I think.. reminds me of the condition of my photo album.