why not write contrivertial (sp) poems? make a stand and voice your opinion. -8-

It’s the outcome of an ideally begun life that sorrows me in this story. His “essays and term papers . . . were always neat, double spaced, . . . perfect.” But after many years had passed, he was more like “a page full of scratched out words, false starts, faulty logic and overly penciled erasures.” Why does this have to happen? I ask, and get only clues. Hurray for stories like this that hint of a better way, of more important things to teach our young than what we were taught, so their middle ages may not cry out, “His resignation was neat like scotch, no ice, double spaced, logical.”

If you mean bipolar disease, which it seems you do, then Amen, Good description! I would call this free verse.

Interesting piece from the pen of the most active and "stuffiest" commentator on Poemranker. I remain unmoved but munificent -6-.

Sounds like a young bunch of hoodlums starting a revolution. Out with the old know-nothings! Well it only goes so far. we need both! Yet you show a note of irony when revolutionaries say, "We will not be changing our ways." Yes, I think you're not being totally straight with us here.

I like this one better than your other recent poems. Leaves and life is a familiar theme, but you've given it a different twist.

I do like "God-shaped holes", although the sentiment is one that doesn't quite float my personal boat, I won't hold that against you.

I've always like the sound of nemesis.

I don't know these people, but like it anyway, nice ring. I'd change "They had" to They'd"

Good up to "bruang" which seems there only for the rhyme, a poor reason.

Suggestion: The prepositions "In", "Behind", "With" as first words in the first three lines strikes me as complicated; forces the reader (me) to construct these relationships in my wittle brain. Distracting. The specific meaning is vague, but the frustration comes through nonetheless.

If "hand cannon" is what I think it is, then we have another boring suicide poem. Please change that, because the other emotions you express work quite well.

such riddles. That "I" construct is almost workin'

such riddles. That "I" construct is almost workin'

"to" s/b "too" "Your face [is] [too] red" "salty onions" is an interesting idea. But, man - this is wordily convoluted - whats it all mean?

interesting parallels between this and a menstrual cycle.

not too shabby. your mission: delete seven words.

Even though this poem is light and doesn't pull at ones emotions like your previous posts...I think stylisticly you nailed it...it flows really well and comes together perfectly well done tre!!!

"Love, Provider, Protector, Lamb" - considering all the choices you have for names, these four seem pretty homogenous and lovey-dovey. Wouldn't it make your point better to use a bigger variety, including some of the darker/weirder ones?

funny. I have no fucking idea whom you are addressing with this one, but it doesn't really matter. ONe asshat is the same as the next.