regarding some deleted poem... |
16-Jun-04/9:59 PM |
Sorry, i'd like to give you something that I think would make this better, but I got nothin'.
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Re: West Coast Epilogue (Pseudo Triolet) by wilco |
17-Jun-04/2:40 PM |
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Re: Of Gifts by thepinkbunnyofdoom |
17-Jun-04/4:04 PM |
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Re: What's Poetry by Sasha |
18-Jun-04/9:49 PM |
Seems like something you just vomited up, but still not bad.
You've got to change this:
All somewhat whisky, wonât apply at all
If I donât know who or what you is
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regarding some deleted poem... |
18-Jun-04/9:52 PM |
I'm getting bored with giving you 9s and 10s so here's a 7. It probably deserves an 8 but, well, I'm drunk and I'm not gonna give ya one.
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Re: Chin-up by Rodavlas |
18-Jun-04/9:54 PM |
Reading is masturbation for the mind.
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Re: Cool In The Army by wilco |
18-Jun-04/10:10 PM |
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Re: "She Phoned This Morning" by ARTIE |
21-Jun-04/2:35 PM |
Good, but I'd like to see you expand it. The "soul doth yearn" thing is a bit (very) old school, but hey, whatever floats your boat.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Jun-04/2:39 PM |
This is one of you're better ones that I've read but the rhymes are very forced. Maybe try writing it without the rhymes.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Jun-04/2:42 PM |
I thought this was pretty good up until the "online...instant messages. I think if you get rid of that part and maybe reword some of the ending, you'll really have something here.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Jun-04/3:33 PM |
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Re: 5/22 by aburiedlife |
21-Jun-04/3:36 PM |
I don't get these people placing their own poems on their favorites list. You have a whole page of your own with all your poems listed there, all neat and tidy.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Jun-04/3:37 PM |
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Re: The Thinker by cedand1 |
21-Jun-04/8:02 PM |
Ok, I dig this one..and extra points for being from Tennessee. ;0)
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regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Jun-04/8:12 PM |
For this to be a lyric, I'd like to see a more well defined chorus (I know you don't have to have one, but I like choruses). Otherwise, pretty good.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Jun-04/9:18 PM |
Great poem! Do u ever watch Pimp My Ride? That shit is whack.
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regarding some deleted poem... |
22-Jun-04/5:46 AM |
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regarding some deleted poem... |
22-Jun-04/2:26 PM |
Definitely has a haunting feel to it. Something about S3 bothers me, but I'm not sure what it is. I'll have to give it a few more reads. Here's a 9.
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Re: Niggers Don't Write Poetry by pain killer |
22-Jun-04/2:29 PM |
Who are these people? Why would using the word "nigger" give them "cred"? I'll give you a 3 because I'm intrigued, but you're going to have to explain more if you want a good vote.
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Re: The Riddle of Creation by Dovina |
23-Jun-04/3:46 PM |
That's a nice little fairy-tale, but I don't buy it.
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