Re: The beauty of a bird by mozac	18-Nov-02/12:16 PM
Thisis so not about the beauty of a bird. Expand on the image or change the title. Show us why you picked that title. Is there some comparison you forgot to make. Also, you need question marks.
Re: I Begged by abbaslittleclingon	17-Nov-02/4:18 PM
The whole beneath warm sand thing makes this less than it should be. ALso line 5 needs to be refinished. It starts out fine but the end fall short with the repetition of the word 'me'
Re: a comment on Prose poem written in 1 minute and 27 seconds while listening to Slim Cessna croon by poetandknowit	16-Nov-02/9:47 AM
Is that a real invitation, or are you just messing with me virtuall? Because I'll go. Just say when.
Re: a comment on Prose poem written in 1 minute and 27 seconds while listening to Slim Cessna croon by poetandknowit	15-Nov-02/7:52 PM
Everything frightens you.
Re: a comment on Dynamic Duo by INTRANSIT	15-Nov-02/5:25 PM
It came from an attempt at showing all possibilities. I answer everything I receive. I don't have your address so all I can do is send a reply. My records show the transaction completed. Yours?
Re: a comment on Dynamic Duo by INTRANSIT	15-Nov-02/4:21 PM
Drop them both. Shake hands with the left. A sign of fellowship. Perhaps he speaks to you that way because he envies your liberty, or because he likes you. Why can't you benefit from the doubt?
Re: Ode to the unwanted chip by deadstar	14-Nov-02/9:11 AM
This poem is somewhat stale. Ha ha, I'm funny. It made me smile so that's a good thing. it reminds if of how children feel sorry for inanimate objects. I used to sit on the wobbly chair at home because I knew no one else liked it and I didn't want it to fell left out. My son does the same thing with his toys, well he used to. He doesn't play with toys anymore(sigh). I think children would appreciate this effort.
Re: The Wooden Armchair Of Similar Dreams by Caducus	14-Nov-02/9:02 AM
There's a lot of wonderful language here I especially like "The derilict peace" that images I think is an important one, for me anyway. "Ensuring life and not existence" makes me say 'fuck'... but in a good way. Unfortunately my less favorite rhyme(love/above) is also found here. When ever I see the word above at the end of a line I know the word love is not far behind. Ha, I made a poe-m!
Re: a comment on the pot collected water when it hid us from the rain by kiki	13-Nov-02/10:13 PM
Are you trying to say my opinion is somehow less valuable then your professor's? Are you sorry? REALLY? I doubt it.Well received by the likes of you I'm sure. I suggest you post poems based on your own enthusiasm and perhaps dealing with some actual human experience. Oh no, I forgot that is somehow forbidden. Yet you post something reeking of loss and pain and mis-understandiing. . I just don't like your arrogance and your unfriendly comments. You could be the next God Damn Big Deal and it wouldn't matter, because you're mean. I sure I'm not the first to tell you so.
Re: The Land of Back-to-Front by [mojo]	13-Nov-02/4:58 PM
Wonderful, I can't think of any flaws except minor typos. Very cheery. I like nonsense.
Re: The Real You by jonny2000	13-Nov-02/2:16 PM
So your 12. Fantastic your poem needs a little help, but I can't imagine my son writing anything close so I'll give you 4 for the poem and 3 for having the courage to write poetry. Post some more. The second line seems to have a typo, or did you mean to leave the 's' off of think and he? Try writing this without having to rhyme. I'm curious to see what that looks like.
Re: a comment on without music by Limness	13-Nov-02/2:07 PM
The second stanza. Try to replace all those "alone"s. with god only knows what. I lose your voice there. You're such a clever girl, am sure you can come up with something. Or even 'alone, alone, alone/I. He. We.' I don't know, just the tone is so educated and then that central part seems less than.
Re: a comment on Cancer Haikus by poetandknowit	13-Nov-02/1:56 PM
Well not really understand the grief, but more work through it. In my experience grief is a very effective mind alterer. I don't wish for grief, but I don't run away from it. Kind of like being told you have cancer, or your pregnant. Everything comes into focus. Only grief is a telescope looking at 1,000 of varying distances. It forces me to focus on each aspect individually, instead of as a whole. That takes time. I love these poems.
Re: a comment on Cancer Haikus by poetandknowit	13-Nov-02/1:48 PM
Ultimately aren't you writing these poems for yourself? I believe an artist has his duty to the public, but he also has a duty to himself. Sustaining the grief in order to understand it, thus becoming a better artist and person, hopefully. I never thought of these haikus as being about cancer. They are cancer. The cancer of grief.
Re: Colony by <{Baba^Yaga}>	13-Nov-02/1:11 PM
Squaw is mis-spelled and so is buffalo. You're a great writer, poetry, comments, confessions. I mean it.
Re: a comment on There is no end by INTRANSIT	13-Nov-02/10:50 AM
I like watching two people have sex, but porn is so unreal and ridiculous. I think I'll have ice cream for breakfast. I'll pour some coffee over it.
Re: a comment on Today by INTRANSIT	13-Nov-02/10:47 AM
Ohhh. I never am things, I feel them. I don't know what I am, but I know what I feel.
Re: a comment on Today by INTRANSIT	13-Nov-02/10:39 AM
The why must wwe all suffer comment is relevant to the knowledge that we all suffer. Not because of your poem, but because it is the stuff of life. I was being compassionate.
Re: a comment on Today by INTRANSIT	13-Nov-02/10:31 AM
No not at all. I was simply asking if YOU are the pain ( I doubt it) or if you are IN pain(that's the mood I pick up from these few lines) I love this kind of economy. I think you could come up with something else to reveal at the end instead of repeating the first line. If I thought it was bad I would just come out and tell you.
Re: Today by INTRANSIT	13-Nov-02/10:14 AM
You are the pain, or you are in pain? why must we all suffer?