| Re: St. Germain & The Charismatically Uncomitted by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
19-Nov-02/3:30 PM |
|
Hello again, can't even remember reading this before, how sad. Anyway, there are too many wonders here to single out just one but I love, I can't one or even two, the whole things tremendous. Bravo.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: a comment on I Stand Mesmerized by abbaslittleclingon |
19-Nov-02/2:41 PM |
|
Your poems are crap compared to mine.Why don't you write about your childhood that would be interesting. I come from a long line of peasants via Spain, Argentina & Ecuador. You should stop acting like a dictionary with Tourette's syndrome, or a monkey in a tuxedo. You've never had a single lesson in anything? Whether self taught or otherwise? You're so full of crap. Pretention knows no economic boundaries.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Dad by Someone |
19-Nov-02/11:38 AM |
|
Get rid of the rhetorical questions. They add nothing except making you sound pitiful, which is very uninteresting. Your problem is interesting, so I'll take this scrap heap and write a poem about it for you later this afternoon.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: A lighthouse by emilyowey |
19-Nov-02/12:34 AM |
Let not mine eyes gaze upon this putried assemblage.
My life is a suasage link and you, you are the pancake.
I'm drawn to your butter and imitation maple syrup.
Guide me home again
Into the security of a carbohydrate blanket.
An elevated glucose level shines behind your eyes.
Oh House of Lite Pancakes
Close not the kitchen.
I am drawn to you.
I am drawn to the fork and knife.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: All is Just a Crush by confuzdlilgirl |
19-Nov-02/12:20 AM |
|
"For one to own the feel of being free" is worht the effort. Trudge on. You're young yet. You need an intelligent scarf to wear with those butt-huggers. Take a vow of silence. It works. No cell phone, no radio. No gum smacking trance music girls gone crazy.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Sisters in Disquise by confuzdlilgirl |
19-Nov-02/12:14 AM |
|
If I was your friend, I would never let you go out wearing this poem. It makes you look fat, and kinda stupid. O.K., really stupid.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Litany of the Mullet by Shin-Bojangles |
19-Nov-02/12:08 AM |
|
"There's only one choice." would have ended this better. Otherwise puerile as ever.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: The Social Muse by w~* ATHENA *~w |
18-Nov-02/11:59 PM |
|
The last stanza is sheer brillance. The rest is sadly tainted by the grammartical fart at the end of L3 S2. Rework that and you'll have 10s up to your _____ (insert body part here) I'd say boobies but i'm not quite sure how tall you are. So I'll say pelvic mound.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: "Why would I need to get in touch with you?" by Limness |
18-Nov-02/1:45 PM |
|
Too anorexic. I think 'The weight of those words" would add some much needed direction. Also try title in qoutes. What do you think?
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Wind Whisper by abbaslittleclingon |
18-Nov-02/1:41 PM |
|
Not bad. Antiquiated, but it the rythmn doesn;t detract from the sense of it. Or in ohter words you managed it without having to revert to silly sentences.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: I Hear My Name Called Again and Again by abbaslittleclingon |
18-Nov-02/1:35 PM |
|
Typos a plenty. Not to mention searing waves??? I believe you lifted this from some silent movie.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: I Stand Mesmerized by abbaslittleclingon |
18-Nov-02/12:58 PM |
|
Look everyone! It's Rod McKuen meets Ansel Adams. I bet your parents bought you lessons in eloquetion(sp?). You always refused to take of the toga and laurel wreath at the end of class.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Bloody Sonner by The Eskimo King |
18-Nov-02/12:52 PM |
Your hemmorrhaging all over the place. Nurse, this poet needs more suction. I can't see what the bloody hell he's talking about.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Boy I Know by Goose |
18-Nov-02/12:24 PM |
|
Yuo are discribing every ding-dong on this site. Including me, though I am feminine and old. Of course we do have one or two Phd.s hanging about, but they are expert in ideas and words. Hah. As if that where something worthwhile. They can't fill a cavity or a prescription. They can come at you with words,and words and even more words. No cure. Quite the contrary, they breed schizophrenia in this weak culture of ours. Subversives. Spending untold thousands just to toss around the acedemic ball. You're friend has promised nothing, and owes nothing. It's 'too' not 'to' in line 7. Your poem smacks of judgement, and righteuos indignation, Pee-you
|
|
|
 |
| Re: The beauty of a bird by mozac |
18-Nov-02/12:16 PM |
|
Thisis so not about the beauty of a bird. Expand on the image or change the title. Show us why you picked that title. Is there some comparison you forgot to make. Also, you need question marks.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: I Begged by abbaslittleclingon |
17-Nov-02/4:18 PM |
|
The whole beneath warm sand thing makes this less than it should be. ALso line 5 needs to be refinished. It starts out fine but the end fall short with the repetition of the word 'me'
|
|
|
 |
| Re: a comment on Prose poem written in 1 minute and 27 seconds while listening to Slim Cessna croon by poetandknowit |
16-Nov-02/9:47 AM |
|
Is that a real invitation, or are you just messing with me virtuall? Because I'll go. Just say when.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: a comment on Prose poem written in 1 minute and 27 seconds while listening to Slim Cessna croon by poetandknowit |
15-Nov-02/7:52 PM |
|
Everything frightens you.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: a comment on Dynamic Duo by INTRANSIT |
15-Nov-02/5:25 PM |
|
It came from an attempt at showing all possibilities. I answer everything I receive. I don't have your address so all I can do is send a reply. My records show the transaction completed. Yours?
|
|
|
 |
| Re: a comment on Dynamic Duo by INTRANSIT |
15-Nov-02/4:21 PM |
|
Drop them both. Shake hands with the left. A sign of fellowship. Perhaps he speaks to you that way because he envies your liberty, or because he likes you. Why can't you benefit from the doubt?
|
|
|
 |