Re: On returning to a town where I used to live by Nicholas Jones	15-Feb-07/6:04 PM
"I remember the tiny details of the place" is a decent hook (as in, start there), but you need to follow with actual details, or contrast it with something that tells the lie. You've told me something, vague, and I don't believe you. An extra point for Starbucks, vile corporation that they may be, because I've always wanted to watch Battlestar Galactica, and I could use some coffee.
Re: The Horror The Horror by Nicholas Jones	15-Feb-07/6:10 PM
Not reading the whole thing, but caught something that might be a good hook; "Imagine -- saying it, meaning it" ((no need to repeat the title, we know, we know the reference)) Run from there. I like "I joined a party to fight for socialism but found ideology was out of fashion and we’re all in the centre ground now." Tell me more? I think you're all over the place on this, and I'm not feeling any of it, except the odd scrap.
Re: Les Imagistes by Nicholas Jones	15-Feb-07/6:13 PM
This is actually clever. The thing I'm missing is it flowing. Sad but I think it needs a poet's touch, or maybe just an editor's. "I argue ... work" doesn't move things along as much as the rest, I think. Passable? Almost.
Re: Uncontrolled scribblings one luch break by Nicholas Jones	15-Feb-07/6:18 PM
Hey, this takes clever and runs with it for a bit. I'd drop the self-referential (and so therefore also write), since it's not about that _so_ much. ICO pen? I'm missing a bit, but I like the self-abuse. :)
Re: Around 4am at this time of the year by Nicholas Jones	15-Feb-07/6:20 PM
eh. convoluted language just for the sake of sounding poetic? it's a moment, but the moment has no context that makes me care.
Re: Complaints by jessicazee	15-Feb-07/6:25 PM
The bear took out my knee! Damn, I'm going to have to be more careful with what I watch. This has something, maybe, but it's too compact for me to get it and feel what I've gotten; I think it needs a little more flesh--but that's definitely no guarantee.
Re: Lonely Hearts by Stephen Robins	15-Feb-07/6:29 PM
Imititation Jam, Kennelling Lobsters? Hmm. Ah, VDs? Great for Valentine's, yes? Cute, much cuter than the blatancy of it belies... but not enough for me, still, to care. Too much reliance on shock value, I think...?
Re: Friday's Monday's June by Enkidu	15-Feb-07/6:30 PM
I like how this runs, but the obscurity reads like too much randomness to me. Nothing against randomness, but I need chaotic randomness, where there's a pattern if I can discern it ((and maybe I'm just not good at discerning)).
Re: Topography by MacFrantic	15-Feb-07/6:31 PM
Calypso and apogee? Hmm. Order.. and disorder--makes me miss an old techno album lost to age. too abstract for me?
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Feb-07/6:34 PM
I laughed at the last line. I don't pay enough attention, though, and there's not enough in the poem itself to convey the full situation to me. Or maybe I just want it more complicated than it is.
Re: The Ballad of Rakesh Rajani, Court Reporter by Rakesh Rajani	15-Feb-07/6:35 PM
wow. ouch.
Re: Captured by Dovina	15-Feb-07/6:38 PM
those would have to be big hands -- a shovel, a pick, and a wheelbarrow? We're talking Paul Bunyan, here. I apologize for his tiny member, though--we didn't do enough testing on those pesticides. General impression--not interested, really. A curious idea, but I'm not buying. More context, maybe?
Re: The Medium of Dunce by Ranger	15-Feb-07/6:41 PM
Hmm. Interesting, maybe something clever, but both over and under told...
regarding some deleted poem...	15-Feb-07/6:46 PM
awkward, but does well for being so.
Re: Celui by half.italian	15-Feb-07/6:48 PM
the last two lines are the redeeming glory, and the rest does well for being put so plainly, but... the thought's only so much.
Re: Ode to a Pimple-Lyric Spawned by Phalkon's Greasy Face. by SupremeDreamer	15-Feb-07/6:50 PM
hm. Do I need to make a new feature "poems inspired by this poem" sort of thing? nothing in and of itself, and I don't know Phalkon yet, so...
Re: a days journey by donmiguel1960	15-Feb-07/6:51 PM
ow. not a good ow. I sympathise, but only because, er, I do get where you're coming from. But not from the art of this poem.
Re: JUST A FEW by rbooey	15-Feb-07/7:05 PM
ouch.
Re: JUST A FEW by rbooey	15-Feb-07/7:05 PM
If you actually mean any of this, know that it is a very poor tribute. Which is not to be ashamed of--probably most tributes are poor. But if you do actually mean any of it, consider trying to improve it--or just move on.
Re: sad moments by rbooey	15-Feb-07/7:07 PM
There is no happiness.