Re: genious by the_poetess	9-Mar-05/1:53 PM
While it's a sentiment that wouldn't hurt to cram into a daily "why am I?" session, this talked about the situation from outside of it too much; make me feel how this thought applies directly to your life--grip me with context, colors, sights, smells, tastes...
Re: Striking minds by celticskatermatt1	9-Mar-05/1:57 PM
"Blow the man down, bullies, blow the man down; Way ay - blow the man down, O Blow the man down in Liverpool town. Give me some time to blow the man down. " Sorry, doesn't work for me.
Re: Snow Sucks by JoyLuck	9-Mar-05/2:49 PM
I like the waves, but I don't really see it as snow, sucking or otherwise. Cute, but not a pipe.
regarding some deleted poem...	9-Mar-05/2:51 PM
A lot of things there you say are true that I could argue with. I suppose you don't miss me, then. forced rhymes and erratic rhythm are painful to me.
Re: Today, last year was on a Sunday by thepinkbunnyofdoom	9-Mar-05/2:55 PM
cute. the beginning was a bit commonplace, and the middle dragged; the ending then felt rushed. I suppose the main complaint is that this is a laundry list, and those are nearly impossible to give substance too, even when this is entirely a story as well. I think you rely too much on the form, here.
Re: A Nation by the_poetess	9-Mar-05/3:03 PM
Definitely one of your better posts; I'd cut it after "Vesuvius". I think it would be rather good if you cut it after "Vesuvius", actually. :)
Re: To those that would teach poetry by INTRANSIT	10-Mar-05/10:21 AM
It's->Its (confused me first read) Interesting, though. Not gelling for me.
regarding some deleted poem...	14-Apr-05/10:17 AM
Very sweet.
Re: Home by Dovina	5-May-05/12:02 PM
testing comment date.
Re: dit da haiku by nentwined	15-May-05/4:18 PM
Had to get this one in for posterity, off the end of the lsat one. I'm sure someone will forgive me. Well, maybe...?
Re: Just a perfect day (Haiku) by ingwa	24-May-05/4:27 PM
doesn't work for me. I get the concept, but the flow stumbles.
Re: Rock of the Earth by ingwa	24-May-05/4:28 PM
"gone by" repetition hurts; I lose the rhythm in "Let me know your experience", and there's not much non-generic to pull my interest fuerther.
Re: Never Ending Cycle by ingwa	24-May-05/4:33 PM
toped->topped, I presume? surfers -> surfer's, maybe swimmers -> swimmer's, definitely still frame -> still-frame ... I think you might have an elegant image here, between the shredded lines. Still, it's somewhat generic; hard to rub a pearl out of it.
regarding some deleted poem...	24-May-05/6:52 PM
cute idea; doesn't work as a poem for me. You could probably get this published somewhere, regardless.
Re: Where was god? by little_big_nose	24-May-05/6:52 PM
pimple :/
Re: To Step Aside And See You Smile by LovingWhispers	24-May-05/6:53 PM
dense, hasn't really said anything by the sixth line that makes me want to read on...
Re: Stranger by Roisin	24-May-05/6:53 PM
Very interesting. Simple, with a hint of meta. I think I like. Speaking of, perhaps there should be an "add this to your favorites" from the poem-vote page...
Re: Hopeless shelter by little_big_nose	24-May-05/6:55 PM
pimple, though could work as cheap death metal lyrics, perhaps. Has a nice, swift flow.
Re: Eating My Soul by little_big_nose	24-May-05/6:55 PM
no thanks.
Re: A stitch by EAger to Offend	24-May-05/6:57 PM
uses a few too many words, or perhaps the words it uses just aren't as effective as they could be. Simple statement, which in this case I think is good, but doesn't work for me. The horrible pop song reference in particular... Hmm. Make me _feel_ these things, describe them instead of name them, perhaps.