Re: I Think by PawnedTidal	22-Sep-02/6:47 PM
Nice. Clean. Too surfacy though, you dipped well with the angel/amiss. Go deeper.
regarding some deleted poem...	22-Sep-02/6:53 PM
Last line seems to be going in it's own direction,but there's a very thin connection. I think differently about people who hve given themselves to god though.WOW!
Re: Lysander cried by bornagainpoet	22-Sep-02/6:57 PM
I like simplicity, could be modified to rhyme without losing it's intent. Good stuff!
Re: The End OF Me by Birdman42s	22-Sep-02/7:00 PM
If at first you don't succeed... Iron it out, otherwise it works.
Re: Ex In Bonds by OneFingerAnswer	22-Sep-02/7:04 PM
Nice rhyme! Almost fooled me with the title, or did you? Next time, turn it up!
regarding some deleted poem...	22-Sep-02/7:10 PM
Sorry,didn't mean to offend. Missed the literal. Does my rookieness show?
regarding some deleted poem...	22-Sep-02/8:04 PM
I read an article in mens' health that told men what woemen expected on a date, written by a woman. I thought why would women help men take advantage of them .Then I thought to write about that but you beat me to it. And simplified it too! It doesn't get any better. 10
Re: Faded by aperfecttool77	23-Sep-02/5:17 AM
Awareness is important, action is more. Good product. Go deeper!
Re: Here In The Heart of Amber by Lenore	23-Sep-02/5:24 AM
Good stuff! Tree sap color? A girls broken heart? I like poems that lend themselves to 2 way thoughts. 8
Re: When The Iron Curtain Came Down by RoseEyes	23-Sep-02/5:33 AM
The"walls" went up late, then came down quickly.First group seems a little off. Easy to read,liked it.7
Re: .:|bittersweet|:. by emman	23-Sep-02/5:38 AM
This has a subtle power,and 3 idea possibilities.Alittle ironing, simplification and BOOM! it's there. 8
Re: suffer the child by edge	23-Sep-02/5:43 AM
Oh how I hate pain and suffering. However as a lyric this does fly pretty easily. Can't think......8
Re: Pilgrim by timfowler	23-Sep-02/5:47 AM
A quietly powerful piece. Quite good acually. I'll leave it to others more Knowledgeable than I to "harsh your gig".8
Re: Punishment and Punishment again by vulcan	23-Sep-02/5:49 AM
Sooooooo much with sooooo little. This is artful!!!!!! 9
Re: Me and She. by peach835	23-Sep-02/5:52 AM
Circ-ular! Love it! Fun! Poignant too.8
regarding some deleted poem...	23-Sep-02/2:40 PM
SCHMOOOOVE! I don't think this needs anything 'cept a glass of water maybe.9
regarding some deleted poem...	23-Sep-02/2:43 PM
OY! I don'tknow which way to go with this piece.Understanding fails me but, that's me not you.9
Re: Friends by Ashley	23-Sep-02/2:48 PM
I think you worked at this. Good feeling however you missed the flow.(Paddled too hard).7
Re: Universal Musings by blu143	23-Sep-02/2:51 PM
Trim this by the first fifty-percent and let it fly.7
Re: untitled by ThreeFourSix	23-Sep-02/2:54 PM
I hate it when they don't listen! 7 his could use more and not hurt it.