Re: All Alone In A Selfish Moment by ARTIE	30-Oct-03/2:30 AM
Dandy.
regarding some deleted poem...	30-Oct-03/2:31 AM
Your beard is like the Moon, Huge and exciting.
Re: Hot Pig by kingit	31-Oct-03/1:41 AM
This would be better without the arbitrary indentation and line breaks.
Re: Small made Large by tadpole	31-Oct-03/1:44 AM
Why not direct it into fashioning the world's largest sausage kiev and hiding inside it until you suffocate?
regarding some deleted poem...	31-Oct-03/11:12 AM
If Jesus truly is omniclever and incapable of telling lies, then I'll wager my last remaining buttock He won't describe your poemes as "good". In Heaven, by definition, it is illegal to write poetry like this. Having said that, this piece was hauntingly beautiful. I particularly liked the lines "What good is my gaze in the trees" and "What good is this breath that I spout". 10.
regarding some deleted poem...	31-Oct-03/11:17 AM
Do you always take a dump with "Friends and family around"?
regarding some deleted poem...	31-Oct-03/11:26 AM
Oh, I see, yes. There are inspired, creative, truly free souls in the world, like you, and then there are the people who try to hold them down and make them conform to the rules of a cruel society for which they were never meant. Pefectly, sublimely beautiful.
Re: Love Poem by josiefiend	31-Oct-03/1:18 PM
Haunting. Provocative. Nude. Perhaps you would enjoy my poeme "GOODBYE TO MEAT". http://www.poemranker.com/poem-details.jsp?id=32833
Re: Shattered by Katzclear	1-Nov-03/1:23 PM
Can't you write a poeme about something that isn't the amazing, magical thing you think of your life as?
Re: What went wrong with America? (An essay) by Jeremi B. Handrinos	3-Nov-03/5:40 AM
Napoleon had five secret weapons: imperialism, propaganda, fear, genocide and... acute manipulation of power. But the greatest of these was acute manipulation of power. Acute/10
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Nov-03/3:40 AM
Some words of warning, from one Christian to another. http://www.av1611.org/kjv/revolve.html
Re: Aspic by Shardik	4-Nov-03/5:28 AM
Have you ever experienced a 'jowling'?
regarding some deleted poem...	5-Nov-03/9:09 AM
Oh man, I hardly ever get to tick the leaving rant box. This is almost certainly the poeme with the highest mediocrity score of all time. Sir, I pull down my trousers and salute you. 30F137A3 http://www.mycgiserver.com/~prawne/code.jsp?action=decode&thecode=30F137A3 [_] AABB rhyming scheme [_] Arbitrary indentation [X] Arbitrary line breaks [X] Clerical errors [_] Ellipses used overabundantly [_] Lower case only [_] Internet shorthand / emoticons [_] Repetition of a word or phrase ad nauseam [X] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of other linguistic embellishments (alliteration, etc) [X] Devoid of other literary devices (metaphor, synaesthesia, etc) [X] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery [_] About drugs [_] About romantic love [_] About suicide or self-mutilation [X] About writing [_] Cliched imagery (tears falling like rain, angel in heaven) [_] Cliched rhymes (love/above, heart/apart) [X] Sounds like dialogue in a fantasy novel [X] Melodramatic [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [X] Concerns the author's social pastimes [X] Leaving rant [X] Vicarious wish fulfilment [X] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Smugly-named protagonist [X] Sanctimonious [_] Untitled [_] Gushingly religious [_] Obsessed with femininity [X] Rage against the machine [X] Self-obsessed -16- P.S. You are a talentless nobody, and your poetic career will never amount to anything more than self-published anthologies of self-obsessed wide-eyed wondrous drivel that you foist on apathetic relatives. Plus you're a grotesquely ugly freak. Thanks!
Re: A Truth About Mortals by Caducus	6-Nov-03/7:00 AM
I can't begin to describe how this poeme made me feel. Mostly like breaking all your fingers so you'd never again write anything like "Today I dressed myself in rain" or "We are primates who swallow the keys of freedom/Performing for others voyeuristic preconceptions". This isn't a poem, it's pretentious guff with line breaks sprinkled arbitrarily throughout. Maybe you should try reading some real poetry by actual poets next time you're thinking of putting a draft of last year's suicide note through an autoformatter and posting it here.
regarding some deleted poem...	6-Nov-03/3:47 PM
Your entire brain is a massive collection of wrong thoughts, all linked by wrong lines of implication, and all combining together to form new, even wronger thoughts. It's impossible to explain to you why you're a dunce because the web of wrong thoughts is so vast and sprawling that any brave, golden warrior who dares to challenge it just drowns in a sea of ignorance. A deeply stupid piece.
Re: What Do You Do? by tori	7-Nov-03/6:50 AM
Oh look, what a fucking surprise. It's another piece of prose with no poetic characteristics whatsoever, but the author has inserted arbitary linebreaks all over the place and deluded themselves into thinking it's a beautiful freeform poem of self-expression. You're shit.
Re: It was... by Shardik	7-Nov-03/1:46 PM
This is probably the best thing you've written all year. Mainly because it's such a blatant ripoff of "I've got the eaten my crustacean soulmate blues". L.Ol>
Re: Steal my heart by baby_d	9-Nov-03/3:09 PM
Congratulations, you've managed to use "love" three times and "heart" four times in three verses. Without a doubt this is the most beautiful and meaningful poem ever written. Oh yeah, and you used "heart/apart". Do you ever wake up and suddenly think, "Oh no, I'm mindblowingly stupid"?
regarding some deleted poem...	9-Nov-03/3:22 PM
Theorem: God Has A Bum Proof: (1) God has a throne (Matthew 5:34-35) (2) There is no point in having a throne unless you sit on it (elementary throne theory) (3) You cannot sit on something unless you have a bum (elementary bum theory) (4) So God must have a bum (5) Q.E.D Corollary: God makes toilet Proof: (1) God has a bum (by the theorem) (2) There is no point in having a bum unless you use it (elementary bum theory) (3) All bums are used to transport dung from the Jeffrey's Holster, through the exoskellington and into an external receptacle (elementary dung theory) (4) So God makes toilet (5) Q.E.D
Re: paint me a poem with pictures by nentwined	10-Nov-03/4:51 AM
I have become convinced that the sole purpose of this poem is to deliberately confuse the reader so greatly that when he finally deciphers the claptrap within, he confuses his enormous relief that the ordeal is over with a sense of joy and beauty-appreciation. 10!!!1