Re: a comment on A Fish is Always a Fish by Dovina	27-Mar-06/3:45 PM
Haven't you read the above? I already have.
Re: Blue Gravity by Sunny	27-Mar-06/12:55 PM
I'm not into this as much as your others. The first line with "dead headstone" is off-putting. All headstones are dead, aren't they? I like the feathers rocking on the bay. The woman in a Bohemian skirt is confusing - could be you or someone else. Then in verse 2, the narrator could be the body under the headstone. Then the three "she" lines turn it back into a love poem.
Re: a comment on A Fish is Always a Fish by Dovina	27-Mar-06/12:08 PM
Interesting that my final line should conjure that allusion. The fisherman I had in mind is another sort of dude altogether.
Re: a comment on A Fish is Always a Fish by Dovina	27-Mar-06/12:08 PM
Since I think of myself as the fish, I could hardly be smiling.
Re: a comment on Buddy by ALChemy	27-Mar-06/7:00 AM
pey, os ti meees
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	27-Mar-06/6:54 AM
I had that idea in mind. Glad you noticed it. I also tried to show the philosophical notion of numbers as real entities, distinguishable from useful words. If you mix the two viewpoints together you come up with wonderment over whether we are real.
Re: a comment on Buddy by ALChemy	27-Mar-06/6:29 AM
lol. Glad I'm not cixelsid or rellepssim. Caidoz will say I'm htob.
Re: My Prayer by amanda_dcosta	26-Mar-06/5:32 PM
Isn't amazing grace already directly in your path? Must you search for it? And don't you already know how to change your life? Sorry, but it seems you are asking the wrong questions.
Re: Sensually Literary Villanelle by bwaha	26-Mar-06/5:28 PM
I've been a fool, and I've written instead, and I'm still a fool, easily led. I wish I could get it together like you have. Good Villanelle.
Re: a comment on Buddy by ALChemy	26-Mar-06/5:22 PM
I hope it never gets bearded with baggage like that one. And numbers in heaven are where it's at. 747 is a cool, dislexic number. 25 is not, when it's a sign, and you're driving 52.
Re: Cohoma Scott King by rahson_s	26-Mar-06/6:25 AM
The last line is good, but the rest needs attention to construction. Make it more poetic.
Re: a comment on Buddy by ALChemy	26-Mar-06/6:18 AM
Oh, you're no fun today. Here let me kick start your engine. Godproof Hat by Alchemy I used to think God was very large cat With teeth in my neck like I were a rat Then he kicked me outside Where I hollered and cried Now I wear a cat-skin hat
Re: a comment on Buddy by ALChemy	25-Mar-06/11:49 AM
Too late. Already taken. Godproof Hat by Dovina Oh, for a hand on my cranial hair In place of god’s that isn’t there To protect from theistic wrath and such Provide a gentle protective touch Perhaps a goklike Buddhistic affair
Re: A look inside [someone real} by Garrett S Sexton	25-Mar-06/9:27 AM
as soon as you do the most basic of edits on this mess, I will loook at it again.
Re: Time Will Change by x0lovelylarnx0	24-Mar-06/7:40 PM
The first two verses are said so many times in poetry that unless you say it differently, it's a big yawn. In the third verse you begin something arguably unique. But the words "You will hear" stand there with no support like a street preacher. It could be a good poem, holding the same ideas, but better formed.
Re: portholes in a floating coffin (burial at sea) by FreeFormFixation	24-Mar-06/12:02 PM
I thought Galivant might me some proper name, since otherwise it's just a varient of "gallivant", but found none. But since you misspelled confounded, I suppose that's all it is - a name you made up. If this is simply about a seance, I'm disappointed.
Re: Dying for Your Sins by drnick	24-Mar-06/11:52 AM
I think "he's" can be dropped. "insecurities" seems inconsistant with sins and regrets. I like "all his sins" written with no apology or explanation, as if all sins are his. The last line is very revealing.
Re: After The Snow/Diamonds And Rust by Ranger	23-Mar-06/3:24 PM
Your removing Dickens leaves the street scene with scarf and shawl alone to show us the old-time setting. Now we have to wait until "love arcane" and still wonder if the shawl was just a hippie immitation. Also, Cain was to Abel as she is to you. I thought that Cain's guilt was a good way of showing this. It's still a good poem, but not really an improvement in my opinion.
Re: Buddy by ALChemy	23-Mar-06/3:01 PM
Yes, you've done it. Perfect ending. It's enough to make a bible-thumper take another look.
Re: After The Snow/Diamonds And Rust by Ranger	23-Mar-06/9:58 AM
Good use of the Glosa. You stick to the spirit of the original quatrain. "thorn words" and "cold door" - great. The last four lines really clinch it.