replying on Resume by drnick
16 Jun 2007, 3:44 PM
Men typically handle love horribly, you less horribly than most.
replying on Between two Truths by Dovina
16 Jun 2007, 3:36 PM
Would you prefer "styles in worship like designer jeans"?
replying on Between two Truths by Dovina
16 Jun 2007, 3:33 PM
That makes two of us facing a small army. Lock arms brother, here they come.
replying on Between two Truths by Dovina
16 Jun 2007, 3:30 PM
I was trying for a pun on the drink "Southern Comfort" but maybe it's too funny for the subject.
replying on Between two Truths by Dovina
16 Jun 2007, 3:26 PM
The "one great offer" isn't trite. My musings - maybe.
replying on Between two Truths by Dovina
15 Jun 2007, 2:08 PM
Would "in churches colored as cars" be eccentric enough?
Most Kentucky counties are "dry," where beer cannot be legally sold. You can bring it in though, and I assume that's what you mean. I find it unique that cigarettes are legal everywhere in the south including public places and the churches find that just hunky dorewy.
Most Kentucky counties are "dry," where beer cannot be legally sold. You can bring it in though, and I assume that's what you mean. I find it unique that cigarettes are legal everywhere in the south including public places and the churches find that just hunky dorewy.
replying on Dixon Country Store, Kentucky by Dovina
13 Jun 2007, 10:06 AM
That's the way folks in the country of Kentucky are: matter-of-fact. And superstitious too. their lives depend on the weather, as the folks in Greensburg, Kansas, will tell you. Eighty percent of the ones that survived the tornado lost their homes.
replying on Dixon Country Store, Kentucky by Dovina
13 Jun 2007, 10:02 AM
I changed it on my computer only, not on poemranker. Anyway, your suggestion is better.
on rear end of the storm by malpaso
11 Jun 2007, 2:39 PM
Midwest rain will soak you this time of year, but it's a happy kind of soaking when the air is warm. At the front of the cloud is where the lightning lurks and where a lone cyclist or pedestrian sticks up like a rod to catch it, either that or the funnel.
replying on leaves of clover by lmp
11 Jun 2007, 2:24 PM
I think the use of the Apis mellifera is too technically distracting for a poem of this kind. Your theme is good, but to introduce God's power into it near the end seems true, but out-of-place.
replying on Dixon Country Store, Kentucky by Dovina
11 Jun 2007, 2:22 PM
I changed S2, L2 to âheat like we donât get til August;â that gives ia bit of southern drawl and does away with the duplicated word.
on My Sinatra by sca
9 Jun 2007, 2:39 PM
Sinatra serenades for the suffering secretary - on the radio driving home.
on leaves of clover by lmp
9 Jun 2007, 2:37 PM
"the bees drone on" is a good line because drones do no work. So I wonder at "Drones' labor" Also, the truck would have been loaded with honey, not nect'r or nectar. "we never knows"??? Otherwise pretty good.
on Call Someone Right Away by jessicazee
6 Jun 2007, 12:09 PM
It's a sad kind of funny. Just enough to make me think so anyway. More detail would help. And it's a bit too prosaic for poetry.
I heard a balalaika played with Russian hands, and would prefer the singular in line 1, makes is more personal. And the possessive friction's in line 2 seems superfluous. Why is the fretted frame splintered? The triangular frame might be splintered, but the frets are on the fingerboard, and splinters would hurt. I like the sound of this, "holy minor fall of Hallelujah" especially.
replying on The Happy Side of Misery by Dovina
5 Jun 2007, 3:15 PM
Your interpretation is good. The truck came bearing down on the cyclist, then it passed without incident, as they all have so far. But it's always a concern and cause for continued dilligence.