regarding some deleted poem...	17-Dec-04/10:20 AM
Doomed from the start, a lonely man's common tale. Get the spelling right and spiff up the prose, and you too can join the ranks of poets chanting as they march with the lemmings.
regarding some deleted poem...	17-Dec-04/11:27 AM
I once walked along the Appalachian Trail and camped under the hardwoods and felt the music you beautifully describe. The ransom of kisses was not there, nor shining stones of silent blood, or I missed them. But other visions linger from that forested walk, and yours might help to draw them up.
regarding some deleted poem...	17-Dec-04/1:05 PM
You can listen to everyone who votes 10 because that tells you you have touched the hearts of truly appreciative listeners.
Re: Timberjack by Dovina	17-Dec-04/3:41 PM
Come on, at least tell me I used a bunch of redundancies.
Re: Camping by jessicazee	18-Dec-04/10:44 AM
You have posted this several times, each as a new poem. It might be better to post it as a revision of the same poem each time. Then the former comments are still there, but we can tell from the dates that they refer to an older version. It's still a good poem.
regarding some deleted poem...	18-Dec-04/11:52 AM
I got lost somewhere between the sadist and the masochist, which you assign to the same person.
regarding some deleted poem...	18-Dec-04/2:41 PM
Superlatives that you don't really mean weaken your credibility - "much crueler Than anyone’s Hell" "Infinitely high"
regarding some deleted poem...	18-Dec-04/2:43 PM
Not a limerick. If a woman can know what your eyes clearly show, then how can she mistake it?
Re: Disable by blacksoul	19-Dec-04/11:27 AM
My grandmother, especially, was so handicapped. Her two hands could not keep up with her heart.
Re: The years write us by kawakurdi	19-Dec-04/11:37 AM
Very good. Take another look at a few lines: without mutual opportunity Nor before-ten-years you - commas Nor the stars of your looks - "looks" is too plain. catacomb - catacomb mask
Re: Death by Liquid by PsydewaysTears	19-Dec-04/11:55 AM
I had trouble separating the three characters. Aparently, your friend is sipping the drink of "her." Maybe he's an alcoholic drinking her booz, or in love with her. He feeds off your emotions, which I don't get. Aparently you are about to commit suicied by drowning. Or have I got it all wrong?
regarding some deleted poem...	19-Dec-04/12:00 PM
Verse 1 is good and sets a platform for a good lyrical story. Verse 2 only hints, it adds nothing to the story. Verse 3 does not build on Verses 1 and 2, but opens a new direction. Now we have two stories begun.
Re: Grandma's Prayer/Lord Reply by jroday	20-Dec-04/10:23 AM
Why did you delete your recent poem. I hope you did not change your mind because of something I said.
Re: Religious Slaughter by Beyond_Dreams	20-Dec-04/12:02 PM
Reminds of TS Eliot "The Wasteland." Lots of mythology and language to dissect. I get maybe half of it, and that in fragments.
Re: If I knew by Rabbit	20-Dec-04/12:13 PM
Some of the verbs seem wrongly tensed. Verse 4, for example, try "I would kiss you" Line 6 has a problem.
Re: Interstellar Hell by PsydewaysTears	20-Dec-04/12:17 PM
A weak idea, weakly developed. This is not your best. The rhymes do not help. As much as I've criticized your vagueness, I'd rather have it over this.
Re: The Drop by auscot	20-Dec-04/6:16 PM
Colds are bad for prose drips fall from a runny nose though the form is good I think you should make that last line a thing to expose
Re: Mallard by richa	21-Dec-04/10:32 AM
The first sentence is good, except what have you against capitals? Chimera seems too grandiose for a duck's beak. "can try" meaning to try patience or ability, I suppose, seems clumsy. "ear of bread" may be a Briticism. If so, okay.
Re: "oh" by fevriere	21-Dec-04/10:34 AM
It fits the meter, but what does it mean?
Re: Forgotten Strokes by Beyond_Dreams	21-Dec-04/1:44 PM
A bit over the top. A blank canvas sits untouched because it's blank; unveiled, but we see it. Tears overflowing from what? Palette decorated nightmarish dreams, and starlit eyes - outside then. Still a haunting vision.