Re: A smile by Bobjim	Blue Magpie 212.205.251.48	24-Feb-06/11:09 PM
This might be a riddle, but can you explain to me what there is about it that makes it poetry.
Re: Goodbye by aamir_trichy	aamir_trichy 203.129.195.149	24-Feb-06/10:55 PM
PLEASE PEOPLE LEAVE COMMENTS!!!! consider this ... i was sitting in my colleges net lab when i wrote this poem...1 hr ......was bored to hell...
Re: a comment on On Looking Back by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.32.104	24-Feb-06/5:47 PM
Racism 1 by -=Dark_Angel=-,P.I. I worshiped an angel in white. Her face was all blushing and light. So I changed my name to Dark Angel And ceased being Charles Bernard Rangel Hoping she’d fall for my plight. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_B._Rangel
Re: On Looking Back by Dovina	-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 86.135.203.170	24-Feb-06/4:54 PM
Racism 5 by Dovina I once had a friend who was black. I stabbed him eight times in the back. He fell to the floor And I stabbed him some more Then pummelled his head with a jack.
Re: a comment on On Looking Back by Dovina	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/3:35 PM
'Once', 'Who' and 'He' count as limerick words, surely?
Re: On Looking Back by Dovina	zodiac 209.193.18.26	24-Feb-06/3:04 PM
This so-called limerick doesn't use any "limerick words" at all. :-( -not funny-
Re: a comment on Rambling by terbenaw	zodiac 209.193.18.26	24-Feb-06/3:02 PM
Unless what you were trying to do is "sound like Doug Soderstrom, PhD", I'd recommend not trying to do it. http://www.poemranker.com/poem-details.jsp?id=117966
Re: a comment on Rambling by terbenaw	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/2:43 PM
zodiac, that made me laugh so hard!
Re: a comment on Rambling by terbenaw	terbenaw 69.237.91.72	24-Feb-06/2:17 PM
Guess I'll try it...
Re: Gaia and Man by Blue Magpie	terbenaw 69.237.91.72	24-Feb-06/1:42 PM
I enjoyed this. It's a bit long, but for some reason, it seems to fit in it's current form. I like the creativity used with the end rhymes, but, I feel that it has limited the scope of the poem in some ways as well. All in all though... this is excellent.
Re: Darker Days by oneglove	Dovina 69.175.32.104	24-Feb-06/11:19 AM
Have you read "Savvy in the City: San Francisco" by Jane Young, especially page 4? Steamer trunks of darker days, speaks of perhaps the Titanic, and twin saphires set in snow of perhaps a skull. I think of deep dives into ocean and memories and a good read.
Re: a comment on On Looking Back by Dovina	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/11:04 AM
To be fair, in my eyes limericks = Edward Lear or -=Dark_Angel=-, who both use a slightly different structure. As such this one felt shorter than I was expecting - but that's just my way of reading it - hence the previous agreement. Either way, this does precisely what a good limerick should.
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	smoofle 88.106.175.245	24-Feb-06/10:55 AM
Wow. Just... wow.
Re: a comment on On Looking Back by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.32.104	24-Feb-06/10:55 AM
Don't be. It's good to hear another view.
Re: Eden to Galillee (by Caducus) by Mona Lisa	smoofle 88.106.175.245	24-Feb-06/10:46 AM
I rather like it, cunt and all...
Re: a comment on On Looking Back by Dovina	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/10:41 AM
Sorry.
Re: a comment on On Looking Back by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.32.104	24-Feb-06/10:39 AM
Yes, it was painful. You see, I only wanted iambic rhythm, nothing fancy. Let me count it for you: I ONCE had a FRIEND in BLACK, Who FELT a TWINGE in his BACK. With BLOOD on my KNIFE, He FLED for his LIFE, So we NEVer quite GOT in the SACK.
Re: last night was like the last one by hendrimike	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/10:25 AM
I quite liked the rhyming scheme although it would benefit from a little more invention - 'in/in', 'long/along' etc. don't really seem to be pushing your creative boundaries at all.
Re: a comment on Revised Dream (Final Version) by Wakeboarder20	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/10:20 AM
Ah, I also see that you're struggling for comments on your poems; my advice (as always) is to give other people feedback first, otherwise they're going to be less inclined to comment on your works. Give and take, and all that jazz. I'll vote on this when it's nearer completion.
Re: a comment on Revised Dream (Final Version) by Wakeboarder20	Ranger 62.252.32.15	24-Feb-06/10:18 AM
Yes, it is certainly an improvement - I really am glad you took out 'fields of love'. Keep adding to this as you think up new images - as I've said, originality is the key. Now, you will probably want to kick me for saying this, but in my opinion the content would be improved if the faith aspect was toned down a little. I'm not saying do away with it - the poem's obviously centred around it - but I think that it would make it easier for you to invent around if you toned down the theology somewhat; this would also allow for more creative poetry. However, I also think you should wait for other people to give you feedback, because others might disagree with me on this point. Keep up the good work!