Re: a comment on No-Strings by sca	sca 124.191.64.243	6-Jun-07/5:21 AM
Yeah, there are some twats on the site. And their prudish tendencies aren't limited to poetry. You probably didn't make it to the forums but they're all either homphobic or incessantly, emospastically self obsessed and/or depressive.
Re: a comment on The North Wind by Ranger	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/5:18 AM
This is possibly the worst thing I ever wrote. But it was about 5 years ago. Nothing pre-2006 of mine is worth reading. Actually, not much post-06 is worth reading either. Nothing wrong with an inventive idiolect, and as for colloquial language, well it depends who you're a follower of.
Re: The North Wind by Ranger	sca 124.191.64.243	6-Jun-07/5:15 AM
There are all this tricky rhyme schemes in the world, but I reckon it's nice to see it taken back to basics once in a while. One on one, obvious yet not obtrusive. Lyrics or not. I'd've written Said in the fifth line with a '. 'Said, short for I said. But I can be the queen of ideomaticity and colloquealist english. So I'd caution you against my advice. But yes, I'd say if we polled it here and now missed 'I love you's would be the chief regret. => Jess
Re: a comment on No-Strings by sca	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/5:15 AM
I joined for a couple of months last year but surrendered all hope when I got people vehemently adamant that I should not have called something a sonnet because it did not have the "right number of syllables". At that point I gave up and decided to live the rest of my life as a hermit in a cave somewhere in Tibet.
Re: a comment on No-Strings by sca	sca 124.191.64.243	6-Jun-07/5:08 AM
Yeah, I've been on there since about 2003. Youngest of the oldtimers... but I'm crawling out of my shell. haha... just isn't like back in the day.
Re: a comment on No-Strings by sca	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/5:05 AM
Is this on allpoetry? That place annihilated my desire to write :-(
Re: a comment on No-Strings by sca	sca 124.191.64.243	6-Jun-07/5:04 AM
I have to admit I like it too. I've been posting my poems in the order I've written them, and lately that's been for contests with weird and obscure guidelines (form, wordbanks, what-have you)... so I took it back a bit. and I think I will put the damn it on it's own. => Jess
Re: No-Strings by sca	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/4:58 AM
This is your best yet from what I've seen. You've got a good sense of meter, although the first line is bulky. I'd split that line slightly: Damn it, why do... etc. "Just-the-one is not your type" is the best line. -9-
Re: Sit tight, sweetheart by JMakStak	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/4:52 AM
Decent enough, although it won't win any prizes for novelty value. The curtains came in a bit suddenly.
Re: Call Someone Right Away by jessicazee	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/4:50 AM
This is super, although I'm not sure whether you want it to be bitterly ironic or genuinely humorous...
Re: a comment on Bitter by Ranger	Ranger 81.103.124.179	6-Jun-07/4:48 AM
Thank you :-)
Re: The Corner Tavern by jessicazee	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/2:45 AM
Hm, I like this and I don't. I like how you desribe things, in themselves, but I don't like the repetition. Kitch language (which I like), but then again the repetition of words like and and for and how kind of drown it out. But I mean, we're talking personal tastes here. You know how it's best read, not me lol.
Re: Sit tight, sweetheart by JMakStak	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/2:42 AM
people blinded by the pr and politics fronting a war? losing loved ones in choosing ignorance? I'm interested to know what this is about, because I like the poem itself, language etcetera. but I like the metaphore/simile/etc itself a whole lot more.
Re: Interest and Association by MacFrantic	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/2:39 AM
S'almost a swinging twenties style applied to an eighties era. I like how you desribe things - the adjectives and metaphores - and the twisted structure behind the words. It's the kind of poem you expect to be read by a slick voice through thick lips. Slant rhyme, and all that jazz. => Jess
Re: a comment on Bitter by Ranger	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/2:04 AM
I have to say I hadn't read the title. Hence to define my understand of bitter beyond the blatantly obvious, you knew she'd regret letting go of you, as you protected her from what may have happened in her past from reoccuring/bringing her back down again. Thus great use of metaphore in the ghosts... => Jess
Re: a comment on [Gasp]{last letter, first letter} by sca	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/2:00 AM
To be honest, I've read very little, and have very little understanding, of any poetry I haven't just happened across on the internet. I like writing literature in all forms, how-ever read mainly books. But back on track, I have liked Byron whence I've read his works.
Re: Bitter by Ranger	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/1:56 AM
I love the rhyme, it's almost hypnotic... and I don't usually like triple entendres. It so eerie in the empty sense, regret in the third person, just a hint of bitter. I like this very much. => Jess
Re: save a class now by FreeFormFixation	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/1:51 AM
I might have to favouritise you so I know where to go when I can come back (whence I'm not cramming for exams). I like it. It's cheeky. On a more formal note I think it detereorated from "And roger was weeping," but I wouldn't change anything if it'll mean taking away from the general feel. Haha, awesome. => Jess
Re: behind the banister by FreeFormFixation	sca 124.191.64.6	6-Jun-07/1:48 AM
Is calico a cat or a dog? Albeit you've got hopeed instead of hopped, at least, but I like your style. I guess I like a bit of skittish madness in the form of freeform, lol. Come to think of it, I've never been a fan of form (because I can't master it myself ;)) => Jess
Re: a comment on The Happy Side of Misery by Dovina	Dovina 70.157.109.220	5-Jun-07/3:15 PM
Your interpretation is good. The truck came bearing down on the cyclist, then it passed without incident, as they all have so far. But it's always a concern and cause for continued dilligence.