Re: On Any Given Day... by Skamper	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/6:30 AM
Ah! Shades of Bukowski. What a wonderful read. This would go well in a darkened room among friends. Snug in the wooly cotton arms of infamy!
Re: The Friendship Storm by x0lovelylarnx0	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/4:32 AM
This one has potential. I do not understand the caps on "White Storm", "Lovers", "Shatters and "Victim's". I also feel that the this would read better with shorter sentence structure, i.e. "The lover's remain separate as the storm reignsd. This poem does not need to rhyme and word choice, especially in the last two lines would make this an excellent read. Also, don;t worry about rockmage and his incessant need to be noticed by giving Zeros. No poem deserves a Zero unless it is so esoteric no one can decipher it or the form and structure is so bad that the writer needs serious help.
Re: INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/2:03 AM
Strong imagery and intensity. I would ditch the punctuation allowing the natural flow to place the periods and commas. It is a distractor to me. Enjoyable read.
Re: part of autumn by winniss	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/1:39 AM
Nice imagery and flow.
Re: a comment on INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	x0lovelylarnx0 68.57.36.157	23-Oct-07/6:57 PM
Haha I just don't think it is fair that a good poem gets a 0 or a 1 just because some jerk feels like it!
Re: a comment on INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	INTRANSIT 204.110.228.254	23-Oct-07/1:34 PM
Save your energy, Leroy. Put it into your own work. It's just plain healthier that way.
Re: INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	x0lovelylarnx0 71.197.10.136	23-Oct-07/1:30 PM
To Rockmage: You have serious problems! It's not right to just go around and give everyone low scores!
Re: Parasite by Christof	INTRANSIT 204.110.228.254	23-Oct-07/1:27 PM
A fluke. Really? I did not know that.
Re: a comment on Never Let Go by x0lovelylarnx0	x0lovelylarnx0 71.197.10.136	23-Oct-07/1:27 PM
No it's not a dream! And it's not temporary if it was he would have let go!
Re: Her name was Marjorie Harper by Caducus	INTRANSIT 204.110.228.254	23-Oct-07/1:25 PM
Polythene and aplologies. But you friggen nailed it!
Re: a comment on While waiting for someone to check in my cars by INTRANSIT	INTRANSIT 204.110.228.254	23-Oct-07/1:20 PM
That is a very good analysis, Ranger. I'm reading Pinsky's- the sounds of poetry and trying to grasp the concept of tension and release in a poem. Pinsky references apoem by W.C. Williams where a woman "gives herself" to eating a plum. Yes, sounds. Perhaps I'm not getting enough work out of that balloon, either. Appreciate the read. Thanks.
Re: On Any Given Day... by Skamper	INTRANSIT 204.110.228.254	23-Oct-07/1:15 PM
Gonna chew on this a while.
Re: Lonely Song(SOAD's Highway Song) by alvinb	Skamper 58.171.80.50	22-Oct-07/10:30 PM
Remembering her makes me thrown...and nigh and ligh Not sure these should mean?
Re: Her name was Marjorie Harper by Caducus	Skamper 58.171.101.173	22-Oct-07/10:27 PM
awed
Re: Henry's breeches by Stephen Robins	Skamper 58.171.118.85	22-Oct-07/10:21 PM
It's horrible - the indignity of being an old man... hurts huh?
Re: One Perfect Moment by sonawrote	Skamper 58.171.74.238	22-Oct-07/10:19 PM
if this is a true account of a time in your life - tell of something that has a personal touch, for readers to connect to the melancholy of it all. Otherwise it's just nothing, a blurb on the back of a romance novel...
Re: Parasite by Christof	Skamper 58.171.81.121	22-Oct-07/10:13 PM
having recently been amazed by fog in a tropical environment I connect with this...nice!
Re: Never Let Go by x0lovelylarnx0	Skamper 58.171.79.44	22-Oct-07/10:07 PM
I'm not sure I understand this one...is it a dream? I am confused a little with the ending, is the protection offered only temporary?
Re: Wayne, do you? by T. Jonathron Remp	Skamper 58.171.79.65	22-Oct-07/10:04 PM
I gave in and went to the site...nice touch... :)
Re: Back to Orange and Black by winniss	Skamper 58.171.89.69	22-Oct-07/10:00 PM
I think tingle instead of tingling would bring this straight into the momment. I like this.