Re: a comment on On Any Given Day... by Skamper	Skamper 58.171.92.150	26-Oct-07/3:47 PM
I have read some Bukowski - my favourite, The Great Slob ah!..rockmage - enigma or arsehole?
Re: a comment on On Any Given Day... by Skamper	Skamper 58.171.50.85	26-Oct-07/3:38 PM
thankyou I feel warmed already :)
Re: a bit of theory by pete	Dental Panic 87.209.75.3	26-Oct-07/6:07 AM
I like it – especially the first line.
Re: a comment on INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	Dental Panic 87.209.75.3	25-Oct-07/10:50 AM
- with the poem, I mean.
Re: a comment on Nomad's Oasis by Caducus	Dovina 75.82.86.162	25-Oct-07/8:43 AM
Either I was a dunce 2-1/2 years ago or you have changed it a lot; I suspect the former. "devoured refusal to stop searching" - it matches the previous line, but can go too many directions. Otherwise good.
Re: INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	Ranger 86.131.50.184	25-Oct-07/2:11 AM
No time for a proper commente just yet but I will say this has fired me up to write something today. Cheers!
Re: _______ by Dovina	Ranger 86.131.50.184	25-Oct-07/2:03 AM
It sounds fantastic, although I'm not sure that "underlined nothing" is such a catchy title...
Re: a comment on Winter Moon by Musicman	Ranger 86.131.50.184	25-Oct-07/2:01 AM
She got the fear of definite articles from me. It's catching.
Re: RAGTIME by xyz	alvinb 121.54.96.18	24-Oct-07/10:48 PM
are you my alter ego?... your poems are for comforting heartaches and mine is the pains of the heartbroken...
Re: INTELLIGENCIA by INTRANSIT	Dental Panic 87.209.75.3	24-Oct-07/4:41 PM
I totally agree.
Re: Forever Moving On by Absorbed Intellect	Dental Panic 87.209.75.3	24-Oct-07/4:24 PM
I, as a member of the FMO, am simply stupified by the sublime accuracy of your poem.
Re: a comment on Winter Moon by Musicman	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/12:42 PM
I just started to peruse this site yesterday. It is becoming obvious to me that we have a lot of poets on a steep learning curve. One of my favorite sites is pathetic.org. A lot of wonderful poetry and recognized poets. Try it sometime, if for nothing else the site is beautifully done (I hate adverbs in my poetry, so pardon mine).
Re: a comment on Winter Moon by Musicman	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/12:37 PM
Interesting view and thank you for your gift! I am most cognizant of the articles in S2. More "A's" rather than so many "the's". I am impressed! This was a very early poem for me and it still brings back a great memory of my childhood.
Re: a comment on Bullfrog Night by Musicman	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/12:31 PM
I agree.
Re: Bullfrog Night by Musicman	Dovina 75.82.86.162	24-Oct-07/11:40 AM
I hate the 5-7-5 restriction some people place on haiku, which in this case requires an unnecessary "the" in line 2. Otherwise good.
Re: Winter Moon by Musicman	Dovina 75.82.86.162	24-Oct-07/11:39 AM
This is good. I think the telling "bittersweet" opener can go. "the serpentine swell" - drop "the" I think. Actually, take a look at all the articles in verse 2. We are not all dunces here, but most have left due to boredom. Welcome.
Re: Her name was Marjorie Harper by Caducus	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/10:27 AM
As a new member to this site this is the best I have read so far. It appears you have a creative flair but please spell check your "aplologies". Also, if this rockmage person gave it a 10 does he not see a couple of technical issues with this poem, since he sets himself up as a critic of some knowledge on poesie? That is if he has REAL knowledge. But I have read a few of his Senryus. Although a few are interesting, I do not see any prodigious SKILL.
Re: Historical Epic by Bobjim	Absorbed Intellect 82.20.237.112	24-Oct-07/8:18 AM
It doesn't really convey a point of sexual nature in Japan so it isn't really poetry of the dark ages when I was a young lad in a dark stormy winter night of July.
Re: I Think Of by forsaken	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/7:15 AM
Hi forsaken. I would love to see this potentially wonderful piece trimmed to bare bones. There are so many unnecessary words and the meter is not fluid. You are also mixing active and passive voice, "I think of the day you'll be back in my arms Keeping you safe from the world's harm" Just a suggestion here: Awaiting the day back in my arms keeping safe my love from world's harm" although I think that needs some work in itself :). Anyway, use that pain you are obviously feeling, but try to write this again with half as many words and you may be surprised what you find!
Re: On Any Given Day... by Skamper	Musicman 192.208.44.100	24-Oct-07/6:31 AM
And, oh yes. The last two lines are pure Bukowski, so I would not be concerned with whoever this "rockmage" guy is. SOunds like he needs to read more and write less.