yak. i have read better from you.no vote sorry!

Pretty funny, was a good read for me. Then again, these kinds of pieces always get my juices goin. You are blessed with nine.

I wouldn't call it spectacular, but I wouldn't call it horrible either. It's a tad dull, in my opinion. You've been blessed with eight.

It had some good parts mostly, but theres a lot of wrinkles that weaken its effect. You've been blessed with seven.

This reminds me of my odd rantings. It began pretty well, but the end wasn't very satisfactory for me. Felt and looked like you just tapered off after "Mr. President" You've been blessed with eight.

Well, I like how its beginning to form so far, but since it's unfinished, I'm unable to give anything higher than an eight.

"her" has long ceased to be viable as a reflexive pronoun.

Shin, I feel as if I've entered a bubble of vagueness despite the cliche familiarity of that line "eye: window to the soul." I'm left floating, face bewildered, scratchin my itchin dome. No Vote.

Is this translation something that you've actually written? 'Cause if so, the classic flare isn't doin jack for me really. And if you didn't write this yourself, then why do you post it's translation? Not here to feel as if I'm looking over literature assignments, but these translations have that effect 'pon me. That said, I'll be reserving my vote for now. Hope you don't take my comment badly- I can't help being an ass since it's a part of my bloated pride.

This ones got a good flow. It'd got well with music.

As a translation, it's Ace. I'm just still having trouble with the whole voting for translations as original work thing. Oh well.

what have you changed, in this version?

I can not believe I dragged my huge ball sack to my desk and scrolled down to poemranker to read this solid excretory product evacuated from Shin Shuu's bowels. What a wheelbarrow of pretentious ordure.

*BELCH* as he picks wings from his teeth.

this is the best poem ever posted by anyone anywhere ever zodiac....mate of horus8 horus8 king of the poemranker notice board/sad sack of shite delete where appropriate

hey horus8...you're quite good actually hah got you you're rubbish mate horus8..got no life got no mates apart from that zodiac dude and he doesn't count horus8 doesn't like angry chickens and uses words like solipsistic in his poems in the vain hope it makes him appear big and clever it doesn't solipsistic is one of THOSE words like asphalt i bet he's used that in one of his poems too i bet he's never used angry chickens i bet he's never been published i bet he's old,ugly and frustated he doesn't like me he doesn't like angry chickens he doesn't intimidate me i'm back boys have fun oh and one more thing parallels twotter

oh you are realy gone this time man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm looking forward to reading obituary to the moon. That makes it hrd to speak on this piece. I see that you are a musician. read a few af mine and let me know if I have any hope as a lyricist?

Sloppy what? Nothing I saw....10,10.

I can see her, silouetted on the shore, pearlessence. In the fog. And I can understand. But those mountains have an addiction. I know, I live in the shadows of the falling sun. I love.