You've caped all line beginnings except Line 4. Thirty two should be thirty-two. I like hso hoping/longing in the last few lines.

Quite great, mostly; I could do without "playing" and a few other doubly described words that keep this less poetic while staying poignant - a personal preference only.

why not spell out p.o.v.- we had to scroll to the right anyway for the honking last line

Try leaving off the last line, or make it the title.

i like it the emotion is strong i'd maybe cut the last two stanzas though.

"I have ifs, and you have me," What a way to live. Yet it's too often true.

2nd to last line- sun's These are excellent. It IS good to be like moss. Are you still in transit? How do you find time to write so much? Do you drive around with a phrase in your head all day until you get to take a break, then scramble to get it on paper?

well said

nice plot twist

songlike. Seems you could tighten up some of the language.

Lovely, tastey words prettily played.

I didn't get this use of "retain" False snow on an allotment to retain, perhaps or to retain warmth sorry for being so traditionalist, but the "+" and the date were eyesores it was good in spite of all that.

powerful and real- I'm totally believing it. I like the lightness and how you play it with the reality that it is serious and painful, too.

Funny

lol, k. Touchin' rearly ever touched ground

The History of Tyranny or is that tyrany???!!!!! Lmao!

Fresh, and spattered with emotions and scraps of thoughts that seem like they have gone straight from the head to the page.

Ace. You don't have to mention the conception of an heir bit, that is implicit in the whole Henry VIII and Anne boleyn simile. I don't think the repetition of callused works either. If the man works trucks let the reader work out where the calluses come from.

Accurate description, but the bullet like/ rapid statements dont bring you out into the bright day, a softer final sentance might add some relief e.g The persistance of night was overcome, I'm sure with nicer language you could do better than that example, but I do think the structure could be altered to massively improve this piece

Didn't like ending on the word sadism, would have voted [8-9] if the last line was secrecy, sadism, shame