| Re: the queen of carts by snacktime |
4-Nov-02/11:41 PM |
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Very effective. I completely ignore the first stanza because I have trouble understanding it. You should either through it out or rework it.
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| Re: Tupperware-Caskets by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
4-Nov-02/5:36 PM |
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Your son just pissed & poo'd all over my living room floor. Joey is tending to him. In the bath with bubbles. Joey is a doll. Thanks for creating the opportunity for my son to practice being a gentle soul. He is at the moment singing blues clues and scrubbing the toddler free of stinky residue. It could save the world.
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| Re: I Love You, My Angel by mytenderrage |
4-Nov-02/5:00 PM |
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You must be a masochist. I hate you/I love you/ I hate you/I love you. You could be a saddist. In which case touche! You have caused me incalculable nausea.
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| Re: Wandering Spirit by angel_uy |
4-Nov-02/4:55 PM |
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Redundant and repetitive. Every line echoes every other line. I think what I'm trying to say is your poem contains a succession of monotonous recapitulations.
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| Re: untitled by bluwiz |
4-Nov-02/3:35 PM |
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Wonderful. The last stanza is as lovely an evocation of the sun as I have ever read. Please find a title for this. L4-S1, is slightly confusing to me, I assume you are speaking of distant stars, but can't quite make the connection. Is this 'she' you refer to the moon?
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| Re: Ten solid facts about -=Dark Angel=-, by his biggest palm frond, me. by horus8 |
4-Nov-02/3:06 PM |
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Better then I ever could have imagined. More please.
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| Re: arise by daniella |
4-Nov-02/2:35 PM |
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i love the last stanza, a familiar melancholia. You reminded me of something long forgotten, I will go and post it now.
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| Re: fading by PunchMeInTheFace |
4-Nov-02/2:25 PM |
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I don't understand the title. Nothing here seems to be fading. Read your other 2, and I get the feeling your not jumping in. Just wandering around the perimeter. This is the strongest and most invested of the 3. I especially can relate to the last 2 lines, but somehow the last line feels overly dramatic in a cheesy sort of way.
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| Re: Jackanapes and smoke buttons by Bachus |
30-Oct-02/8:40 AM |
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| Re: In the Quiet of the Night a Tree Gently Shakes by Nicholas Jones |
30-Oct-02/8:36 AM |
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| Re: Consider The Dead by Bonehiss |
30-Oct-02/8:34 AM |
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I don't dislike this poem, but it get's very cliche.
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:21 AM |
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Well now I'm definitely not excited. You've burst my fantasy bubble. And anyway, if you all were so scintillating then we'd never get down to business. I like a pretty lout every once in a while. They've no need for talk.
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:13 AM |
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You've got lots of brothers. Now why does that excite me?
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:12 AM |
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You must be getting your period.
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:06 AM |
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:05 AM |
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Now that's a funny story. I've been visually your brother as robust and healthy. I hope he's well.
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/8:04 AM |
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Terrific, but why do you add all that sweet stuff to it?
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| Re: a comment on Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/7:59 AM |
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Prententiously expensive you mean. Along with the barleywine. My boyfriend made beer 4 years ago. Best beer I ever tasted. I think I'll try my hand at it.
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| Re: Her Name Is Stella by Tascobar |
30-Oct-02/7:54 AM |
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I thought this poem was about "On the waterfront". Works for me.
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| Re: a comment on boy girl by little_angel_maria |
30-Oct-02/7:37 AM |
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Oh come on, it made you laugh, didn't it? Just a little?
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