Re: Celebration by unknown	5-Sep-02/10:22 PM
Wow. There certainly has been alot of erotica coming up on random recently. This is uncomfortably arousing. Well developed ambience. Sight, sound, taste, smell, touch. The last stanza doesn't live up to the others.
Re: Celebration by unknown	5-Sep-02/10:46 PM
Yeah it needs some editing, but "copper taste of blood" and "naked scalp breathed cinnamon are first rate. Thanks for your concern Mr. Longfellows, but I am single because I'm not married not because I'm alone.
Re: Celebration by unknown	5-Sep-02/10:51 PM
I don't think Fabio would place his face anywhere near her deep smelling open sex. He might kiss heaving breasts but nothing with the copper taste of blood. Did you have to mention Fabio? Now the whole image is ruined for me.
regarding some deleted poem...	5-Sep-02/10:57 PM
There is no poetry here. I searched. I used a flashlight and some tweezers. No poetry.
Re: finally found you by webguy	5-Sep-02/11:01 PM
Cherry handles?
Re: Contra Mundum by psychedelic	5-Sep-02/11:04 PM
gate/fate true/blue and of course the ever popular love/above.
Re: He loves me by susie	5-Sep-02/11:42 PM
thisd poem is absolutely beautiful.
Re: Waiting by itchiwitch	6-Sep-02/7:42 PM
Remove the last 2 lines. They turn this sappy poem into a late night talk show intro.
Re: Thoughtless Deed by craiggiarc1971	6-Sep-02/7:48 PM
Really awful, and pregnant with bad grammaticals.
Re: Ode to writers' block by Roisin	6-Sep-02/7:49 PM
poignant.
Re: More 7-Eleven holdups. by Bachus	6-Sep-02/7:56 PM
Perfect. You have left thirsting for more. Someones probably going to whine at you that the 4th has 8 syllables instead of 7, so you might want to change <isn't> to <ain't>. I don't give a fuck, these are perfect for a monologue. The Haiku bandit.
Re: knots... by anatheman	6-Sep-02/8:31 PM
You must have spent hours working this out. It shows.
Re: Reality by ThoughtfulSoul	6-Sep-02/8:39 PM
Yes, you're right, god is a figment of your torn imagination. So is everything else. Take some serotonin re-uptake inhibitors. You'll feel loads better. Though they might interfere with your so- called talent.
Re: Self by ThoughtfulSoul	6-Sep-02/8:53 PM
Things are not quenched for, they are quenched by. Here's a small nugget of wisdom you can take with you on your quest for enlightenment: Many people will incourage you by telling you your poetry is good. They are lying.
Re: Pleasurable Agony by crims0ngh0st	6-Sep-02/9:04 PM
The antithesis of erotica. Who needs Keigels, after reading this my vagina squeezed shut.
Re: Celebration by unknown	6-Sep-02/9:18 PM
Forget the last stanza it's totally useless. Everything contained within it is implied in the rest of the poem. How about "I kissed from your breasts" "the down of your thighs"
regarding some deleted poem...	6-Sep-02/9:47 PM
excessively showy. The images you create are conspicious with their vulgar display of adjectives.
Re: Perfect Love by snowing	6-Sep-02/10:10 PM
What makes this a poem? Please explain.
regarding some deleted poem...	7-Sep-02/7:05 PM
Very poorly written. No form or imaginative use of language. Virginity is over-rated.
regarding some deleted poem...	7-Sep-02/7:37 PM
Emo poem? What's that?