Re: The Unknown Soldier by abcmonkey78	26-Mar-04/7:52 AM
not bad, monkey. the longer lines help the AA BB rhymes which can easily be tiresome. Maybe you can do something with this line "And all the more I think about it, fear disgruntles breath" and the last couplet, too. What's there is an example of a mixed metaphor - you have all this infantry imagery, then in comes the navy. Know what I mean? Don't run out of steam at the end!! lastly, I won't second guess all your semicolons, since I'm pretty lenient with them, but I raised an eyebrow at a few.
Re: Tennessee by wilco	26-Mar-04/7:55 AM
It's not too shabby, abby. It presents a fairly solid package with a good ending. Sure - have an 8.
regarding some deleted poem...	26-Mar-04/3:04 PM
just the beginning, I hope.
Re: loneliness untold by francis nor capule	26-Mar-04/3:06 PM
yep. Its a breakup poem.
Re: fleeting thoughts by francis nor capule	26-Mar-04/3:07 PM
yep. a "missing you" poem.
Re: a person by francis nor capule	26-Mar-04/3:07 PM
yep. its a love poem.
Re: Divine by Bobjim	26-Mar-04/3:08 PM
simple. cute. cute and simple.
regarding some deleted poem...	26-Mar-04/3:13 PM
Please tell me more of this "child support ending" you speak of - can it be true?? Not as poetic as your usual fair, ~12. Cathartic? I'll give it an 8 cuz it doesn't suck.
Re: mistaken in a glance by francis nor capule	26-Mar-04/3:14 PM
yap. A break-up poem.
regarding some deleted poem...	27-Mar-04/5:52 AM
its a... ah.. experimental battery-powered unfathomably that_transforms_into which_can_be_used_to_repel lobster duster spoon attack-buttock-infested offal essence. -10-
Re: hidden by the indign	27-Mar-04/11:22 AM
I think this is a bit longer than it needs to be to express the sentiment. Which, I have to admit, is a bit difficult to ascertain. Gonna need some punch - best done in a smaller space.
regarding some deleted poem...	27-Mar-04/11:23 AM
I think I've heard this guy.
Re: Disaster in Disguise by Miggy	28-Mar-04/6:00 AM
But now that I[ve] opened them I dunno mig - its true that the rhymes are typically simple for a popoular song, but I feel like some of these exist just for the sake of rhyme. What's this one about?
Re: A Garden Wall by somemorepoetry	28-Mar-04/6:03 AM
Sure.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Mar-04/6:04 AM
yeah... um. no.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Mar-04/6:07 AM
It does a fair job of managing the cadence, and consistent too. Interesting languange. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt on this one.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Mar-04/6:08 AM
Nice, H. Works real well. "And little things made me glad."
regarding some deleted poem...	28-Mar-04/6:11 AM
Its a pretty interesting idea in there, and it evolves well in the first two stanzas. I think the last half of the last bludgeons the point a bit though - _especially_ with it being in first person.
Re: Checkmate by purplewalrus	28-Mar-04/6:13 AM
Not feeling this one - leaves me with half my face scrunched up.
Re: Horny Hornswoggling by purplewalrus	28-Mar-04/6:19 AM
"And present a number of social agenda" despite the possibility that it could be grammatically correct - this should be remade in such a way so that it doesn't raise the question. Laced with interesting political language but I can't get past that it says, overal, "despite our potential, we suck" - that's what I get out of it anyway. Maybe this would appeal to a campus audience more (I did like it better than the last one, though).