Re: R.O.X. by InvertedEar	3-Sep-03/1:21 PM
I can't imagine what it would sound like in song, but I'm nothing of a song writer. However, it does a make beautiful rhythm as it flows through my thoughts. I like it.
Re: To a bum, by RealmOfSong	4-Sep-03/1:26 PM
I like it a lot, but I'm slightly confused by the title vs. the context. It seems more like you're talking to a familiar acquaintance of some sort, rather than a stranger on the street. Or maybe you're calling that acquaintance a loser of life? Hmm, that could be what I originally missed.
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Sep-03/1:27 PM
hmmm
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Sep-03/4:22 PM
I think the stanzas are boring and forced. Too often content is sacrificed for the sake of a rhyme, as it is here. Many have searched, but all have failed - WRONG - I have not failed. Speak for yourself. No one can speak for "ALL"
Re: A Poem For World Peace. by GAY AS FU*K	4-Sep-03/4:32 PM
How old are you? If you're like 12, this is a great poem. Good thoughts and I agree with your motivation for writing it, but it's painful. right fight right fight right fight right fight.
Re: Plum diggity by tadpole	4-Sep-03/4:53 PM
hmmmmm
Re: cold sonnet by <~>	4-Sep-03/4:58 PM
I did like some of it, but I agree, it was a bit wordy and I had trouble staying focused through the middle of it...too much going on.
regarding some deleted poem...	5-Sep-03/2:58 PM
lol, I like it. I really like it. hehe
regarding some deleted poem...	5-Sep-03/3:08 PM
I don't like this one.
regarding some deleted poem...	8-Sep-03/10:38 AM
As weak as your skill can possibly represent. But I'm sure you're used to falling short. And for once you get that insult without having your pants down.
Re: pErFeCt pAiN by William Delacroix	8-Sep-03/10:54 AM
The imagry is wonderful, the passion deadly, and the verse completely beautiful. 10 from me my friend. May I aspire to your skill.
regarding some deleted poem...	8-Sep-03/11:15 AM
HA! You're one to talk about English, child. As long as this all was such boy! "Fudge Packer?" You must be a southern fried in-breeder with an inability to conceptualize an original vocabulary. Good try though.
Re: 'Till Then by sliver	8-Sep-03/11:22 AM
I like the message, but I want to say that it could be massaged a bit. I think you already have a good sense of the rhythm you want for this poem, but it seems a little...unedited maybe. I do like it, don't get me wrong, but I wanted to suggest some improvement because I think it's well deserved and would make this piece so much better. It has potential.
Re: Failure by Nicholas Jones	8-Sep-03/11:26 AM
Interesting. I wonder if you could expand this. Or add more lines, more feeling, more examples. It seems like there is so much more to it. Pretty good though.
Re: Help The Aged by Mr Pig	8-Sep-03/2:23 PM
Mr. Pig, good piece. Hey, can you elaborate on your suggestion for my poem, "Fury," I'm not exactly clear on what you meant. Thanks.
regarding some deleted poem...	8-Sep-03/2:48 PM
What I find most amusing is that you're 45 years old and this is the best poetry you've managed to produce. Gosh, I sure hope I'm as talented a loser as you when I'm 45. HA! I was writing better poetry than you when I was 12. Oops, I mentioned being twelve...suggests 12yo boy...now Joe's getting all excited. Calm down Joe. Didn't your bible tell you that you're not supposed to lust after children? Get it together old fella...not much longer till it's time to be judged...and we don't want to over work that ticker of yours.
regarding some deleted poem...	9-Sep-03/3:18 PM
I like this. It's much better than your previous poems. I think it could stand for maybe one or two revisions, but all things could stand for one or two more. It's good.
regarding some deleted poem...	9-Sep-03/3:23 PM
I like this one too. It's very good. The only thing I didn't like was "Virgin Paper" which is contradictory to the fact that he has already used it...no longer a virgin. And you use the word paper twice within three lines, kind of redundant. Maybe, sheet, would be better in the second placement? I especially liked the last four lines, very nice touch.
Re: On getting back by horus8	9-Sep-03/3:29 PM
Damn...that's one good piece. I'm impressed.
Re: What you know by INTRANSIT	10-Sep-03/12:50 PM
I like the content, but the flow is somewhat choppy, hard to follow. Nice thought.