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Help The Aged (Free verse) by Mr Pig
The agenda begins, The door left ajar is knocked, Cheery words spoke sinisterly, By his stern thin lipped keeper. Medication is administered, He is good, ‘Adjusted’. He is itinerated to his allocated chair, Away from the window too high to see through. He loads his fork gingerly, His mottled hands shake, The egg slips from atonic lips, As goldfishes laugh bawdily. And 4 clocks tick. The cow bell rings and he is ushered away, In to his favourite part of the day. A chance to complete a crossword, And to preen the dead man’s plant. Vera and Bill argue over chess, Bill is adamant he’s ebony, Vera stares her concaved eyes, And Bill concedes. As 4 clocks tick This Alms house soon will close. Decided by a fresh faced council man, Its progress for the Kosovan’s As darkness falls over ‘Sunny Brook’ Like a Greek widows shawl. 4 clocks stop.

Up the ladder: Old Friends
Down the ladder: Unhearted

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 42
.. 10
.. 40
.. 00
.. 00
.. 01
.. 00
.. 01
.. 00
.. 10
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 7.3333335
Weighted score: 7.055193
Overall Rank: 24
Posted: September 8, 2003 12:31 PM PDT; Last modified: September 8, 2003 1:02 PM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] Joe-joe @ 68.194.57.229 | 8-Sep-03/1:55 PM | Reply
Mr. Pig,

It's funny, I'll be 45 soon and all of a sudden I've begun thinking about growing old. I know I've got some time but 20 seems like it was here just yesterday. Getting old in and of itself sucks...what more do the aged endure when they are rejected and tossed aside by an ungrateful community. Its a reflection of our times and the throw away society we live in. God save us from ourselves! -7- Joe-joe
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 81.128.215.144 > Joe-joe | 8-Sep-03/4:24 PM | Reply
I have to say I agree with you on this one, Joe-joe. Elderlys, once valued and respected pillars of the community, are rapidly mutating into little more than fossilised disableds. Carted off to retirement homes and left to whittle away the rest of their days as mere husks, the question we should all be asking ourselves is "Do they matter?".

Well?

Do they?

As society rots from the inside, and sexual immorality runs wide rife, it would be perverse to answer with anything other than "Good Christ they do matter". Age is something that ought to be revered rather than derided. It is true that the body grows weaker over time - the joints may stiffen, the eyesight may have been squandered through years of televisual input, and, in some cases, the upper epidermis of the grizzled physique may become gnarled beyond belief - but to place the emphasis solely on such deformaties would be to ignore the very essence of senility. In a world were plastics have taken over from the more traditional woods, can we really afford to cast aside the priceless blessings of wisdom, maturity, fosilisation and life-experience that ripen so succulently with age? What are we to do with these hand-me-down relics of retrospective humanity? Toss them aside like used napkins? Good Christ I hope not.

My advice would be to take the time to listen to what they have to say - you might even learn something.

Just remember to keep some napkins handy. Leakages can occur.
[n/a] Joe-joe @ 68.194.57.229 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 8-Sep-03/4:49 PM | Reply
Angel,

Beautifully put! I could not agree with you more. The book of Proverbs, my favorite book in the Bible, powerfully describes the virtues of wisdom. The irony is that wisdom is so abundently present in the hearts, minds, and spirts of our elderly....but we don't see it!! Actually we can't see it because we a blinded by the desires of the flesh!
[n/a] Joe-joe @ 68.194.57.229 > Joe-joe | 8-Sep-03/4:53 PM | Reply
Angel,

Think about fashioning the words you've used above into a poem. You write with great passion about this matter. I'm sure you would knock out a 10!! Go for it!!
[8] J.B. Manning @ 129.44.35.24 | 8-Sep-03/2:23 PM | Reply
Mr. Pig, good piece. Hey, can you elaborate on your suggestion for my poem, "Fury," I'm not exactly clear on what you meant. Thanks.


[10] ?-Dave_Mysterious-? @ 195.92.67.74 | 8-Sep-03/2:54 PM | Reply
I, my secret identity being Methusela, am 969 years old, and as such I enjoyed this poem greatly. I give you 10 for "he loads his fork gingerly" alone.
[n/a] deleted user @ 24.222.81.233 | 8-Sep-03/3:58 PM | Reply
I liked the thin lip keeper.
[8] EAger to Offend @ 65.95.231.253 | 8-Sep-03/4:38 PM | Reply
You have a very natural style that is fun to read. Something about the basic stucture of each stanza as being simply a well-composed sentence. I try to work that way but, I always feel like there's just too much to say. Hence the collection of bloated poems I've amassed since joining the "ranks".
[n/a] Joe-joe @ 68.194.57.229 > EAger to Offend | 8-Sep-03/4:57 PM | Reply
I understand exactly what you're saying.... I struggle with the same issue. A good sergeon always makes a minimal number of cuts when working her craft. Wel, if all else fails we've got a great future at the local butcher shop!
[10] http://mulberryfairy @ 216.195.146.238 | 8-Sep-03/6:34 PM | Reply
I have a poem about a 89 year old client of mine who lives in an assisted living home, but you did such a good job of showing us this place and telling a story that I dare not post mine. Excellent. 10
[8] richa @ 81.178.212.6 | 9-Sep-03/9:17 AM | Reply
'atonic lips' and other such rare usage words are not really needed.

The best parts of this poem are the little insights:

the dead mans plant (old people tend to live longer if they are given a plant to look after by the way)

the he is good 'adjusted'

the alms house, that looking after the old is 'charity' and not the responsibility of everyone.

a good piece
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