Re: a comment on Sagadahoc to Hudson by http://mulberryfairy	11-Aug-03/8:42 AM
Thanks for your detailed feedback, I used some of it in my revision. In this poem, the Sagadahoc and the Hudson are rivers, not counties, but I've altered the poem slightly to make it more clear because of your expert truck driver feedback. Man, I would love to be a truck driver for a month or two, think of all of the stories you can tell, and all of the music and books on tape you could catch up on. I had a boyfriend who was a truckdriver years ago, and I appreciated his tales from the front, what an interesting subculture. I can understand your screenname better now, too. Anyway, there is something called a "startle reflex"- it is what makes babies spread both arms suddenly, so it is not that the passengers have startled reflexes, the jolts have aroused their startle reflexes (like when you are sleeping and think you are falling- My startle reflex always goes crazy on bus travel). As far as oral possibilities go, oral is the only kind of sex that would be hindered by a period, don't you think? These two would definitely have all other forms of intercourse in spite of period blood. Thanks for your compliments, too.
Re: Memorial Park by Mona Lisa	11-Aug-03/8:05 AM
Nice.
Re: Street Prostitute: Dark Angel by Don-Quixote	11-Aug-03/8:04 AM
I feel the love.
Re: Ali Abbas Welcome To England by scitz	11-Aug-03/8:00 AM
No kidding.
Re: C a n n i b a l by scitz	11-Aug-03/7:59 AM
Burp.
Re: WHY IS THE MEDIA SO LONDON-CENTRIC? Written last Tuesday by Nicholas Jones	11-Aug-03/7:58 AM
Like how you snuck in all the syllables that you couldn't fit in your haiku, into the lengthy title.
Re: A Day Like The Last by dragonfly	11-Aug-03/7:54 AM
Sounds like a counting crows song, which isn't bad, but could use improvement when it is unaccompanied poetry.
Re: Colony by <{Baba^Yaga}>	11-Aug-03/7:52 AM
I think the dictionary preferred plural of buffalo is buffalo, but acknowledge your poetic right to say buffalos (even though buffaloes is the second place plural form) in order to point out the cowboys' ignorance.
Re: The Cereal Killer Blues by <{Baba^Yaga}>	11-Aug-03/7:46 AM
What brand of cereal do you prefer? I was thinking granola to go with the parfait, but correct me if I'm wrong.
Re: a comment on Maine Freeze by http://mulberryfairy	11-Aug-03/7:41 AM
Thanks, I did alter it there.
Re: a comment on Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe	11-Aug-03/7:36 AM
Yes, much improved, a few typos in there, but definitely better. See BabaYaga's comment below though about the love toy, that doesn't work for me. I have a decent (I think) affair poem too, check it out, it is called "8:45am dentist appointment".
Re: a comment on Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe	11-Aug-03/7:34 AM
I hear you, I have "naked" love toys, but they are battery powered.
Re: a comment on Pina Colada Belle by Don-Quixote	10-Aug-03/8:03 PM
Yeah, I know you are male, I just think of you as female for a split second every time I see your screen name. It could be one of those clit/penis thingies, take a closer look. (Glad you have a sense of humor about it, anyhow).
Re: a comment on Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe	10-Aug-03/7:58 PM
You're welcome. What would this poem have been like if you hadn't been experimenting w/ rhyme but you kept the same subject. Maybe you could replace it with that poem that would be more natural for you.
Re: a comment on Between Now And Then by sliver	10-Aug-03/7:55 PM
Shucks, you caught me trying to skip away without addressing the subject. Honestly, I am athiest, so I couldn't really relate. But it is a nice thing to write to your father, and a nice way to talk about grief.
Re: Social Geeks and Christians by SP REYNOLDS	10-Aug-03/7:11 PM
Liked the last stanza and this plea, especially "“Give us hope, somebody! Take our minds off monotony, somebody! WE ARE GEEKS!” "
Re: Hardcore Denial or Sumpin'. by Shardik	10-Aug-03/7:08 PM
Chimey, but funny, as usual.
Re: Happiness & Old Age by Caducus	10-Aug-03/7:04 PM
So sweet. I like the stanza in which you talk about your worst fears, the TV dinner, arriving early to "argue with the black driver"- hilarious. You need an apostrophe in Mum's (referring to her gravy).
Re: Between Now And Then by sliver	10-Aug-03/7:00 PM
Line 8 should say "Savior's side"
Re: Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe	10-Aug-03/6:57 PM
Line 2: change to - "too" Line 8: wanting to dry what, her eyes? too forced Line 12: despise seems forced too, it is a verb, after all, and you are using it as a noun for an emotion. I am not a rhyming poet myself, so I can't really talk, but the rhyming poems that are most enjoyable to me don't have lines that all end with one syllable words, those rhymes are too obvious and predictable, and they halt the lyrical flow of the words. It doesn't seem like rhyming poetry is going to be your strongest area, at this point.