Re: a comment on Freud suggested that I commit murder. by DreamerSupreme	17-Feb-04/11:14 AM
Comment Malfunction- Penile Infection Perhaps?
Re: a comment on Freud suggested that I commit murder. by DreamerSupreme	17-Feb-04/11:12 AM
I wasn't trying to say anything really.. I just looked at it as a "very funny look into the mind of the mentally unstable".
Re: a comment on Freud suggested that I commit murder. by DreamerSupreme	17-Feb-04/11:09 AM
Sabotaging your hard-earned average ranking? Fuckin pussy. :P
Re: a comment on Freud suggested that I commit murder. by DreamerSupreme	17-Feb-04/11:05 AM
I didn't say Jung was obsessed with sex- I intended to say that Jung thought Freud was really talking about sex when he "suggested murder". But that little snip was an afterthought anyway heh.
Re: a comment on Dawns Blood Concealed by SupremeDreamer	17-Feb-04/10:59 AM
Don't forget to pray to my miniature statuette- Remember to say all that you've said in this comment. Thank you.
Re: Brother by andrewjthomas	16-Feb-04/4:45 PM
It was a joy reading this poem. There isn't anything here that bothered me; perfect write, except I'd change the linebreaks-- but honestly now, every poet has his way of applying pressure on the space bar. (What were you trying to accomplish exactly with the peculiar way you've inserted the line-breaks? How were you trying present the poem?) Blessed with ten.
Re: La Belle Epoque by andrewjthomas	16-Feb-04/4:23 PM
Editing suggestions? Cmon now, we are talking about a fucking massive amount of material here-- so to keep it simple perhaps you should break this up into several poems? This piece as one entire poem is a short novella; then theres the linebreaks ofcourse... its seems a little random, and just about midway through the piece it seems like you suddenly abandoned putting form to your blank-verse all-together. Other than the length, I enjoyed all of it (most of it anyway, there is ALOT of IT.. and my brain can only digest so much information at once.) Blessed with ten.
Re: Wanderlust (1st Draft) by andrewjthomas	16-Feb-04/3:41 PM
Quite good.. I think you could compact this and concentrate on the last two stanzas; I believe they have the most impact, the rest seems like filler-- but there are some nice parts which are worth remaking. Just some suggestions/opinions, do whatever you like with it-- just don't get offended, whats the point? Blessed with nine.
Re: a comment on Dawns Blood Concealed by SupremeDreamer	16-Feb-04/3:20 PM
Could you provide an example of what you've read which is the "same type of crap you heard a million times before"? And don't give me a thousand stupid poems about "morning", because it is small piece of my poems over-all metaphor.. if you haven't noticed theres alot about vampires and blood, and that too has been done a good bit-- BUT, I don't remember any of them talking about vampires in the morning since everyone knows sunlight kills the fuckers? Then theres the cleansing bit which provides the poem with a fairly sound ending... all-together the poem utilized common subjects together to create a very different context that I think has a pretty original meaning-- In other words its not something thats been done much or at all; I could be wrong though, because I am undeniably human.. or a mutant hybrid of some sort-- So please provide some evidence or examples that would affirm your vague claims and provide an answer to your grievances? Me personally- and egotistically? I believe you're simply saying my poem is unoriginal because I compared you're last posted poem to the ones I wrote when I just started puberty. But everyone has their own day to day conclusions about everything that happens or exists within their own personal interpretation of reality. So the truth is unfortunately deteremined by claims that are largely considered to be true. Shit happens-- Getting spooned with a fork might cure common human confusion?
Re: Nowhere but now by phbiscuit	12-Feb-04/3:14 AM
I like the poem.. but not the linebreaks.. Might I suggest linebreaking it this way?: ____ Nowhere but now here with these last few hours and this setting sun by the drinking trees soaking the breath and the minutes like water for life falling and failing these summer-soft moments throwing us back to the grass-bed holding on where we know we will never be again with dew drops growing beside and beneath the forms we have sunk into the bent-sole grass for these last few failing hours. ---- Blessed with eight.
Re: Lisa's Song by horus8	12-Feb-04/1:07 AM
-as our tunnel ends with train- with train? "with a train"? I'm confused. ;/ But other than that, sound cool- when are you going to make the mp3? Blessed with ten.
Re: To A Streetchild by Sam	4-Feb-04/11:07 PM
It's melancholic and padded- over all it has little to offer (to me atleast). It's also redundant and doesn't evolve into a work of real subtance. No offense, its just my take on it. Blessed with five.
Re: a comment on Something's gone wrong by zodiac	4-Feb-04/10:39 PM
Just tell me what I forgot to notice?.. ;/ I'm faultly and therefor human, be merciful.
Re: a comment on Emily Mae by horus8	4-Feb-04/10:31 PM
You fail to realize that he mentioned things like "rainbow wand" and "air dagger" to insert odd sarcastic humor. It is in no way intended to say that you are Wiccan. As for being stupid: You are the one who lacks the mental-power needed to keep up with the rest of RankerVille. Remember, its a good idea to make use of your thinking asscap before yapping.
Re: a comment on Emily Mae by horus8	4-Feb-04/10:15 PM
Your reply is just collected bullshit combined into a redundant and superfluous reply. Perhaps you left your thinking asscap at school?
Re: The Weight of Words and the Meaning in the Wind by somemorepoetry	4-Feb-04/10:11 PM
Its looks like a theraputic journal entry. Could have used these title(s) instead: "A patients written letter of grievance to his therapist" (or: 'infantile contempt for ones salaried shrink')
Re: a comment on Emily Mae by horus8	4-Feb-04/10:04 PM
Who are you, and from what anal cavity did you crawl out from? And what would interest you exactly?
Re: Something's gone wrong by zodiac	4-Feb-04/9:55 PM
Oh, another thing which I failed to mention earlier: Its not really much of a pimple.. other than the subject having a romantic context, it is devoid of mis-spelling, trite rhyme schemes, poor use of language, crude humor, and other characteristics usually found in most pimple poems. It's pretty much a very decent free verse poem, atleast to me.
Re: Something's gone wrong by zodiac	4-Feb-04/9:48 PM
I like it- my only problem with it is the use of "thronging", which doesn't sound right.. perhaps "enough to shake you awake, call it quits, step out of the house into the [crowded darkness] (or) [tense {or hectic} dark]" Or something, because "throng" is a verb; def: press tightly together or cram- which makes little sense, so I don't have a clue what you intented to express with its use. I could be babbling foolishly, but an explaination would be nice. Blessed with nine.
Re: Gethsemane (or, Jesus learns what's up with dying) by zodiac	4-Feb-04/9:21 PM
Whether its an actual poem or part of a novel your working on- its written in a way which makes it more than just a narrative dialog; at the least its very good prose. What makes it enjoyable for me is the suggestion of pantheism and the theory that god is a manifestation of the mind- and that you depicted the humor that it could entail. I'd love to read this novel you're in the process of making; your style of writing and the subjects you explore fascinate me immensely.