| Re: Hells Game by Katie |
5-Nov-02/6:55 AM |
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katie's back! there is some nice stuff in here. in the two "You thought you..." lines, you'll want to change the "where"s to "were"s. i like those lines, though. the poem veers from subtle to not so subtle, but it's one of your more solid poems (although what do i know).
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| Re: The Gunfighter by deadstar |
5-Nov-02/7:13 AM |
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if you've never seen the film "The Gunfighter," you should, then revisit this poem. nothing wrong with the poem, but it could be a little tighter.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
5-Nov-02/11:29 AM |
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at least the last stanza is honest (sort of).
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| Re: Hells Game by Katie |
5-Nov-02/11:31 AM |
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katie, in those same lines, you have two more "where"s to change to "were"s.
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| Re: Drinker's Haikus 2a and 2b by cacophony |
5-Nov-02/11:46 AM |
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i say once you hit 30, you're too old to drink that shit and should move on to scotch. sounds like your stomach's telling you the same thing. nice. 8
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| Re: the pot collected water when it hid us from the rain by kiki |
14-Nov-02/7:41 AM |
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i hate to say it (after all the other comments), but i like this poem. it's a little "exquisite corpse" and cold around the edges, but in its scatterbrained way, it's effective.
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| Re: Mendacity by kiki |
14-Nov-02/7:51 AM |
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i can't quite place this style. it's somewhere between jim morrison (yuk) and the surrealists (slightly less horrible). so impersonal, though, that's it's hard to connect with. reminds me of snorting ritalin and talking in circles and writing it down. those were the days.
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| Re: The Wooden Armchair Of Similar Dreams by Caducus |
14-Nov-02/8:17 AM |
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if i were Dannara, i wouldn't know how the hell to take this (not that i do anyway).
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| Re: Ode to the unwanted chip by deadstar |
14-Nov-02/8:25 AM |
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| Re: Haiku Gymraeg by Nicholas Jones |
19-Nov-02/6:38 AM |
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what the fuck is this shit? is someone taking a class in gaelic (is that what this is?) and writing poems from the dictionary? is poetry supposed to convey something to the reader? know why i'm asking?
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
19-Nov-02/6:48 AM |
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i remebered to vote. were you listening to the Pixies when you wrote this shit? chien andalou?
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| Re: yellow verse by daniella |
19-Nov-02/6:51 AM |
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| Re: "Why would I need to get in touch with you?" by Limness |
20-Nov-02/8:44 AM |
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i give this one two swastikas up! lovely work. 9
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
20-Nov-02/8:48 AM |
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oh, strider, put in a little effort and the world will reward you with its
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
20-Nov-02/8:52 AM |
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this makes me feel something, but i'll be damned if i know what it is. i like that, and i like it. 8
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| Re: In the heart there is freedom by mozac |
20-Nov-02/8:54 AM |
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this reminds me of the answer to the question no one asked.
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| Re: The Sea by Moss |
20-Nov-02/8:56 AM |
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i hate to dissent, but if i have to read one more goddamn poem about the sea, i might have to kill a kitten on my way home from rehab tonight.
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| Re: two poles are better than one by <~> |
26-Nov-02/12:46 PM |
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this is amazing...until the last two stanzas. i think your ire got the better of you and you let the words get away from you a little. knowing you, you probably did it on purpose and i'm missing the point.
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| Re: November's Pot Marigolds, Still Blooming by <~> |
26-Nov-02/12:48 PM |
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i have an Alusian named Calendula! 8 swastikas!
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
26-Nov-02/12:51 PM |
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