Re: Day Dream by Jessina	9-Dec-07/5:35 AM
This is an excellent poeme. Unfortunately it makes me think that you don't really appreciate the true meaning of Christmas. You think it's all about getting presents, but it's not.
Re: a comment on Day Dream by Jessina	9-Dec-07/5:35 AM
Excellent use of "mat" to rhyme with "sat" by the way.
Re: a comment on Another Date by Dovina	27-Sep-07/4:02 PM
So presumably someone like Hulk Hogan. Or Mr T. Oh wait, I get it. They don't have to be physical rocks-- you want an emotional rock. But then Mr T is also an emotional rock. He'd never crumble under emotional pressure because the only emotion he has is one of intense rage. And pity, of course. But only for fools.
Re: a comment on Between two Truths by Dovina	15-Sep-07/2:50 AM
1 Samuel reads like the ramblings of a drugged horse.
Re: a comment on Between two Truths by Dovina	13-Sep-07/3:18 AM
I'm extremely disappointed (and ashamed at having not read preceding verses) that it wasn't God who made them build the golden hemorrhoids. Chiefly because it's less funny now. But I am at least cheered by your apparent attempts at making excuses for Bible verses that are so obviously beyond Thunderdome. Just "a story, not the Gospel"... what are you implying? That the hemorrhoid plague verses aren't, from The Bible's point of view, meant to be taken literally? That they're just made up? Why include such a bizarre, sick story in the first place? I can understand using parables to teach subtle moral lessons (or whatever) but this is clearly not a parable. What can divine hemorrhoid plagues teach us about life? This is what I think: the normal, healthy reaction to a story like that is a mixture of revulsion and derision. That would probably be your reaction if you'd never heard of Christianity before. You can prove me wrong at once by stating unambiguously that you agree the hemorrhoid plague story is stupid and childish; that it was obviously made up by men, not God; and that it ought to constitute a serious stain on The Bible's reputation.
Re: a comment on Between two Truths by Dovina	12-Sep-07/3:41 PM
This morning I entered my drawing room and saw that someone had left a Bible on the chaise longue. Trembling, I opened that Book at a random page, and was confronted by this: -------------------- [1 Samuel 5:6] The LORD's hand was heavy upon the people of Ashdod and its vicinity; he brought devastation upon them and afflicted them with tumors. [7] When the men of Ashdod saw what was happening, they said, "The ark of the god of Israel must not stay here with us, because his hand is heavy upon us and upon Dagon our god." [8] So they called together all the rulers of the Philistines and asked them, "What shall we do with the ark of the god of Israel?" They answered, "Have the ark of the god of Israel moved to Gath." So they moved the ark of the God of Israel. [9] But after they had moved it, the LORD's hand was against that city, throwing it into a great panic. He afflicted the people of the city, both young and old, with an outbreak of tumors. [10] So they sent the ark of God to Ekron. As the ark of God was entering Ekron, the people of Ekron cried out, "They have brought the ark of the god of Israel around to us to kill us and our people." [11] So they called together all the rulers of the Philistines and said, "Send the ark of the god of Israel away; let it go back to its own place, or it will kill us and our people." For death had filled the city with panic; God's hand was very heavy upon it. [12] Those who did not die were afflicted with tumors, and the outcry of the city went up to heaven. -------------------- That's the New International Version. Probably most amusing is the 21st Century King James version, which substitutes "hemorroids" for "tumors", and contains my favourite Bible quote of all time: [1 Samuel 5:9] And it was so that, after they had carried it about, the hand of the LORD was against the city with a very great destruction; and He smote the men of the city, both small and great, and they had hemorrhoids in their secret parts. As if hemorroids in their secret parts (as opposed to where, exactly?) wasn't punishment enough, in a final act of spite the Lord demands a guilt offering from the Philistines consisting of "Five golden hemorrhoids and five golden mice" (1 Samuel 6:4). Firstly, I can't think of anything worse to model out of Gold than a hemorrhoid (apart from a tumour, perhaps); and Secondly, how can anyone of non-demented moral intelligence read guff like that and call it gospel?
Re: a comment on California Bound by Dovina	1-Aug-07/1:54 AM
Only if he's black.
Re: a comment on California Bound by Dovina	30-Jul-07/10:28 AM
that's racist.
Re: a comment on Prayer by amanda_dcosta	19-Jul-07/3:47 AM
Do not mock worship, you boor.
Re: a comment on Summer Festival by Christof	16-Jul-07/3:15 PM
I would have punctuated it like this: During a day and a half of wind and rain There's no point bringing the washing in. And the loose-limbed shirts and trouser legs, The clinging bras and flapping skirts, Slick with water like sweaty skin, Dance a blissful drunken shrug And will not stop till the sun floods in.
Re: a comment on Summer Festival by Christof	16-Jul-07/3:11 PM
I hope you disciplined her.
Re: a comment on Wreck of the Poor Anchor by Dovina	16-Jul-07/1:45 PM
I may not suggest that. Only mens may grow facial hairs. Womens aren't allowed. I myself maintain a 3-4 mm layer of stubble, because it enhances my grizzled features, making my excellent jaw line even more excellent. I only shave it down before meeting my idiotic clients -- a ritual which vexes me greatly, because it means I must wander around nude-faced for a couple of days, waiting for the Excellence to return. Womens, on the other hand, should have pure, delicate features, unsullied by the loss of innocence which comes facial hairs and the capacity for rational thought.
Re: a comment on FHjk by Dark Angle	15-Jul-07/5:18 AM
Would you rather I hadn't replied at all?
Re: a comment on FHjk by Dark Angle	14-Jul-07/6:43 AM
As Jimmy Carr correctly pointed out: the reason old men need viagra isn't because they're impotent. It's because old women are so very ugly.
Re: a comment on Wreck of the Poor Anchor by Dovina	14-Jul-07/6:38 AM
May I suggest that you're a dunce.
Re: a comment on Alternatives by Dovina	14-Jul-07/6:28 AM
No, he's thinking of a world without ethnics. So was Lenon. Imagine there's no muslims. It's easy if you dare. No need for duncely prayer matts, Or unsightly facial hair. Imagine all the normals Living for today... You may say I'm a racist But it's just a point of view. And I hope someday you'll join me Unless you're ethnic too.
Re: Structure of a Woman by al-naafiysh	9-Jul-07/10:12 AM
"Nothing is more deceitful," said Darcy, "than the appearance of humility. It is often only carelessness of opinion, and sometimes an indirect boast." In your case, I'd say it's the indirect boast. But that aside, Womens always fancy themselves as "complex" creatures. The reality, I'm afraid, is heavily laden with shame: http://tinyurl.com/2bxrqo
Re: a comment on Walk The Boy To Circles by horus8	28-Jun-07/7:26 AM
I'm so sorry, but Hindu has been officially voted The World's Most Unbelievable Religion.
Re: a comment on Tribeca by Dovina	12-Apr-07/7:06 AM
McShane sold out to Hollywood. He plays Al Swearengen in the extremely popular "Deadwood". I guess he's as good as dead, but could be revived if he returned for a feature length, digitally remastered "Lovejoy: The Revenge" film.
Re: a comment on Tribeca by Dovina	12-Apr-07/5:14 AM
I watched kabadi as a youth, which is why I know so much about ethnics. Wasn't it on that Saturday morning channel 4 programme called "Transworld Sport" or something?